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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Cheating on fabswingers?

34 replies

Smh1990 · 16/01/2025 00:36

Fed up with my boyfriend when I was 5 weeks postpartum I found messages to a girl on his phone. That he claimed was a fake profile messaging him. Because of the shock I didn’t read them all but the first message said “did you cum for me dadddy?” Which he said was her opening line and that’s how he knew it was fake hahahaha f**&&’g ha!! Anyway we managed to get over that and im now 6 months postpartum.

he was being shady with his phone all week again and he was hiding it when I was around and then I went to go borrow his charger and couldn’t find it only to find he had put it in the spare room with his phone attached while he had popped out … bingo

I went straight to his history and found fab swingers and clicked it and found a profile but he had been messaging MEN!! I also found a link to a 20yr old woman in lacy black lingerie on the same sight who turned out to be trans and was flashing her penis.

he told me it was all a fake account to catch out his friend who uses the sight and is cheating on his gf with males. I have heard stories about his friend from years ago and it’s not far from the truth but it’s makes no sense either way!!! He also claimed he didn’t pay membership but it said on his account he was a gold member

feeling fed up now!! I don’t know if he’s lying or not?! But I feel like I don’t know him anymore!! We just bought a house together and I can’t stand any of this

he said he didn’t pay for membership unless it gave him free membership or it was a mistake but after looking at how to sign up I know he had to have given permission. What am I missing??

Cheating on fabswingers?
Cheating on fabswingers?
Cheating on fabswingers?
OP posts:
Gggglinda · 16/01/2025 13:28

Lies are meant to be plausible.
Of course he sounds convincing and is trying to worm his way out of it. Men like this never admit to what they've done. Come on op, you can't be this naive. He isn't on there to catch his cheating friend.

ChristmasPudd1990 · 16/01/2025 17:27

Sounds like today's equivalent of "I wasn't smoking it,I was holding it for my mate". I'm sorry 😔

PawsAndReflection · 16/01/2025 20:18

Agree with all of the other replies- this is honestly one of the most piss poor lies I've heard on this site!

Bin him off, he's not worth the damage to your mental (and possibly physical if he's been sleeping with others) health- take it from someone who has experienced this

Runingoncaffeine · 16/01/2025 21:06

The fact he’s doing this so soon after you’ve given birth to his child is both deeply alarming and disturbing.

Lilaclinacre · 14/07/2025 07:19

He's paid for the site, hes a gold member and its not ever free. Hes been seeing/having sex with/cheating on you with other people (doesnt matter if its man,woman etc). You have 2 choices here only, you either stay or leave. If you stay, then stay in the knowledge that he will never change because this behaviour does not change ever. Only you can decide. I wish you the best.

Marble10 · 14/07/2025 07:54

What is it when men’s obsession with FabSwingers?! My ex was obsessed with this site too. Especially weird considering it’s mostly men on it.
He is definitely lying 🤥 no one is that concerned about finding if his friend is cheating ..

GentlemanJay · 14/07/2025 08:26

Gold member. Yep he has paid for that. Allows you more messages and photos.

GentlemanJay · 14/07/2025 08:27

Loads of cheating men on there. Many are happy to meet other men. Far easier than meeting women.

MeTooOverHere · 14/07/2025 10:04

Smh1990 · 16/01/2025 01:17

He was so convincing but when I try bring it up he cries and says he fell out with this friend years ago because of the swinging and he’s upset that the guy now goes with men as well. He told me he’s trying to catch him out but I’m sick of this gaslighting. I will be confronting him tomorrow so he knows I wasn’t born yesterday!!

If he "fell out with this friend years ago" why is "he’s trying to catch him out"?

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