Ex broke up with me because he was overwhelmed with our fights and needed to focus on himself. Throughout the whole breakup, he made it impossible for me to move on. Kept reaching out, calling me, stalking my social media and I had to tell me to stop contacting me and leave me alone, yet he would still do it but I’ll ignore. I wasn’t able to get with another guy because I wasn’t over him and needed to process the breakup. Then my ex started trying to win me back. Even talking to my friend to help him plead with me to answer him. Fast forward we are back together. He asked me if I had been with anyone during the 6 months of our breakup and I told him. I tried talking to other people but I just couldn’t take it any further because I was trying to process the breakup and still loved him. But when I asked him, he said he hadn’t been with anyone. It’s been a month of a way better relationship and I just found out he actually had a brief fling with a colleague immediately after our breakup which went on for 2 months. They also had sex. I feel very hurt and betrayed. He lied to me. He would not allow me to move on meanwhile he was having sex with a co worker. He said he was scared I wouldn’t want him back if he told me and apologises telling me he always loved me that’s why he tried to move on with someone else but couldn’t. I feel very disappointed because sex is something sacred for me. I also just lost my virginity to him and I am 23. He’s way more experienced than I am. He says he knows I feel disgusted by him but he is sorry. He felt overwhelmed. They only had sex once he said. I then asked him to show me the messages but he deleted them . He said he understands if I don’t want him anymore. But he wants to make me happy because I’m special to him. I told him I feel disgusted. I’vecan’t get it out of my mind how he was with her in bed. How can he do that to me. I feel like a fool. I’m I valid for feeling this way?