Experiences of dating someone who has a personality disorder

[Nogothatwayagain]

I unfortunately around 4 years ago met and fell for a "charming" slightly older man who turned out to be a borderline with a side serving of bipolar. I have never felt more alone or confused as I did in that connection. Something wasn't right with him from early days but as I got further and further into the relationship I found myself becoming a different version of me. I went through so much bullshit because of him and wanted to speak to others who have experienced the torment. If anyone can share their experiences I'd be greatful

You might find the Freedom Programme helpful in order to learn about healthy relationships. I imagine you're pretty traumatized. Trauma based therapy might help you process it.

I was (briefly) involved with someone last year I had actually known from childhood - she was in a bit of a mess (to put it mildly): Nice mix of ADD, BPD, drink and money issues, I tried to help but couldn't. I escaped when I realised there was nothing I could do to make things better. Painful to do, but the alternative was being sucked down and losing the good things about me. It wasn't an acrimonious break-up, but it still hurt for a while.
Sometimes it's better to be alone than with someone who isn't right - and I think if you're naturally a giving, caring person - you need someone similar, or they'll end up (intentionally or otherwise) just taking until you've got nothing left of yourself. Just try to surround yourself with good people, they'll heal you better than books or therapy.