Friends' marriage crumbling down, caught in the middle

[Usedphone]

We're friends with another married couple. The "OG friends" are the wife and myself, but our husbands got along really well and we enjoy hanging out together.

We're fairly close to them, we've helped them out whenever we can, and we always felt they were a very solid couple.

Until yesterday, when my DH witnessed a massive fallout between them and since then my friend's husband has used him as an "agony uncle".

I thought of messaging her, but decided against it because it would then involve me. At some point the husband almost left, and we did think of offering the spare room, but it would look like we're taking sides when we aren't.

I guess what I'm asking is, how can we stay neutral while also supporting both?

I wouldn't offer the spare room. I think it would all end in tears and you would lose your friend.

I would keep out of it. If your friend wants to talk to you she will.

Yes don’t insert yourself. Wait to be asked.

I’ve just had this with good friends recently. The wife asked us to stay neutral so we could be there for the children. Family friend, kids are close too. It’s really hard though. Harder on them of course but it’s tough. Wouldn’t do it for anyone. My DH is getting fed up of it all TBH as were several months down the line.

My DH felt completely drained and it was only a few hours!

Our 5yo also really loves their daughter.

Just don’t mention anything to your friend and don’t get involved. Stronger couples actually have huge fights, it’s a known thing. They will probably get over it

Seriously, don’t take sides. They will probably work things out and taking side will irreparably damage the friendship dynamics.