Same old shizzzle

[Saturdaysleepday]

After feedback please, I’m F48 stayed good friends with ex partner after a long time apart. I have a history of anxiety and depression that I have managed to get on top of the last year and felt so much better. Been on holidays abroad with friend and in the Uk. Just before Christmas we had a uk overnight break, had a great time but when we got back friend not really chatty as they are usually. Had a couple of conversations with ended up me asking if everything was ok and I got a “yes”. Forward a few days later and we had a small disagreement via text but within hours he said doesn’t want to speak to me anymore. I feel upset and also angry as he does this every year around Christmas and NY (definitely not the first time). I’m not entirely blameless in this but if they were a real friend they wouldn’t just drop you and pick you up when it suits. I’ve now deleted his number btw.

It's up to you who you have in your life. I don't have time for mood swings and sulkers. If he did it once I'd make it clear that I wouldn't put up with it again.

Remaining friends with an ex rarely if ever works out well and it's not the first time he's pulled such a cheap stunt on you either. He's no friend to you and this is who he really is.

Keep his number deleted and do not get back in touch with him via any method.

@username0763 yes, he has done it several times over the years. I worked so so hard on my MH last year to the point I started to enjoy my own company again and actually be able to leave the house. I feel that it has set me back a bit but gonna keep moving forward.

You have been doing so well. You're working hard on yourself and making progress. Go into the New Year with firm ideas of what you'll accept and stick to it. It really increases your self esteem.

@AttilaTheMeerkat he tries to justify his shitty behaviour with “this is who I am and I’m not going to change”. I started to stand up for myself more. The disagreement was due to me being frustrated about the lack of response to my messages when days earlier he text constantly . It drives me mad with replies of nope or thumbs up. I said just be honest with me.

He is incapable of being honest with you.

Drop the rope he holds out to you here entirely and no longer be a part of this game playing. He will not do your mental health any good. Reassess your boundaries here; what is and is not acceptable to you in terms of behaviour from anyone else.

Thank you for your reply. The silent treatment makes me feel anxious like I have done something wrong and he knows that and does it more.

Just say you cba with his immature attention seeking mind games and you can clearly see his motives 👍. Literally give him a thumbs up - it will drive him nuts.

@EveryOtherNameTaken I know I can be a pain at times but my other friends say that if he was a true friend he wouldn’t just drop me over a relatively small disagreement. Looking back when we were together a few years ago he always goes moody and sulky this time of year. I know Christmas is t for everyone. Most of my friends think he just uses me to have someone to do stuff with.

He's using you as a convenience. Let him know you know his game.