So heartbroken I can barely think straight

[Wishingthingsweredifferent38]

That's it really.....I haven't eaten in days, I've barely slept. I'm a solo parent to a 6 year old and I'm trying so hard not to cry in front of him but I feel numb to my core, even finding words to make a sentence feels impossible. I feel so hurt and rejected, unwanted. Like I'll never be good enough for anyone.
No point to this other than I need to vent somewhere anon. Someone please tell me it gets better. This isn't even recent, but has come up again after a conversation and now I'm sunk so low. I always felt like there was a chance, a glimmer of hope, until about a week ago and now I can't imagine how I will get through each day, let alone get over him.

One day at a time - an hour at a time if you need to - is literally all you can do right now. Sending love x

It will get better op. Do you want to talk about it? How long ago was it? Is it your child’s father? Has he met someone else?

He’s not my child’s father (he had an affair which started when I was pregnant and I found out when our son was 8 months old. This is the first person I have had feelings for since). There is no one else involved, but his mental health plays a huge factor. I just wish I could help him, and that he would let me.

Have you posted about him before? This rings a bell. You had to be told to leave him alone?

No, I haven’t posted about this before.

Op I’m so sorry it didn’t work out. You have someone who loves you no matter what- you and your child are family and all your child wants is you to be happy. Be kind to yourself and try and distract yourself with your child, going out for walks, reading, watching tv, if you can paint or have a hobby, going to eg an art gallery or a place you live, chatting to friends, going shopping etc. remind yourself that you don’t need a man to be happy x

You will always be good enough for one person - your lovely little boy. He is all you need. Forget (stupid) men and your love life, all the validation you need comes from being no 1 in his eyes, as his brilliant mum who care for him and provides for him.

Two years ago I felt the same but I am happier now. I used to distract myself all day and then hide in the bath and then my bed as soon as my daughter went to bed.

Does he have an actual diagnosis by a medic? And at what level are we talking GP or psychiatrist ?

Mental health issues are a tragedy for all involved but sometimes they are used as an excuse or people will do destructive stuff knowing that, It may be self medication such as using alcohol but for instance if a person has bipolar it could trigger mania.

It will get better. I promise 💐

It will absolutely get better, but also don’t pressurise yourself to feel better or not feel whatever you are feeling it’s okay to be sad and upset if you need to be. It will pass.

Stick to a routine, look after your nutrition and sleep.

When you feel a bit better focus on what positive things you can do or look forward to.

Its easy to imagine your previous relationship was perfect etc etc, but presumably it wasn’t if you split up so make a list of all the things that weren’t going well to remind yourself you haven’t lost something amazing.

And don’t forget your little one loves you unconditionally and needs you.

You are clearly still quite fragile after what you went through as a pregnant/ new mother..... being let down so badly at the most vulnerable time can be soul-destroying, when the person who should be caring for you betrays you.
You are in no state to be supporting men with mental health problems, and they in turn will not be able to support you. You can't make them better, you are not their saviour. Avoid such men going forward, and focus on your child.
I wonder if your feelings about the recent ex are somehow enmeshed with your feelings about your dcs father?
Have you had any counselling? It might help. You are not unworthy, you have just been treated very badly. It's not your fault.