I have been feeling quite empty and unfulfilled for a while now in my marriage.
Mainly due to having nothing in common with my DH.
We barely chat about anything apart from the children.
He has very limited hobbies, just gaming (his work is providing technical support online for gamers). He is good with DIY but not motivated. Good cook but hardly cooks.
0 friends, just my friends to socialise with. Don't talk to his family at all (overseas). No exercise or in to any sport whatsoever.
Very passive in everything, I do all the planning, holidays to social to big financial decisions.
I earn double him, he is hard working but very illiterate in terms of finance and doesn’t want to learn anything. I’m on the other hand keen to invest, has a lot of knowledge and I do try to learn - we are in a fairly good financial position due to me started investing in early life.
Good dad in terms of taking them picking them taking them to activities etc. Do care for them greatly. But nothing else really, dont read or teach them anything. All on me.
Big issue - I dont find him attractive anymore.. he also has PE problem and doesn’t want to go to GP to fix.
I have had counselling privately for myself, he doesn’t want to do couple therapy but after lots of honest conversations he has tried to do more in the house, improves his hygiene (it was disgusting before).
He is trying but I’m constantly feeling irritated when I’m near him. Just don’t want to break up the family because we don’t argue much now, do things as a family together okay still.
He does blame me on nagging and demotivating him a lot, criticising and putting him down.. I admit I do feel frustrated over time..
Kids are 3 and 11.
I’m just feeling I’m missing out, cant see myself living with him for the rest of my life, also he is the only sexual partner I have ever had. Don’t have much sex over the years and honestly feel like I’m ready to leave just to experiment and find more joy to my life before I’m getting old.
But would it be too selfish when he is trying to change? And break the kids’ hearts? And I might end up being single and lonely for the rest of my life? He does loves me very much still, does care for me but we have very different personalities and goals in life..
Has anyone left and regretted?