Betrayal

[KookyOP]

I have just found out that my partner of 25 years has been lying to my face about the fact that he has never put me on the deeds to what I thought was our house, I paid thousands for him to get his house back in London and he sold it for nearly a million just because it was in the middle of London but as soon as he got that money, it was always me and him together and now I find myself living with my landlord because that’s what he is and I had a nervous breakdown and my hair fell out and I had to take time out of work and I had to ask him for any money like a child and now I’ve sat back recuperating and I ask myself how did things end up like this, we’ve got kids but he has charmed them with money, should I run to the hills with no home , no money but I’ll be free or try and talk to him.

You need to get legal advice , get any proof you have of payments to his account etc together

Don't panic, but don't say anything else to him until you've spoken to a solicitor.

You might need to insist on changing the deeds or marriage or a deed of trust.

If he doesn't agree then you might start court proceedings against him.

You need urgent legal advice. Were you on the mortgage? Do you have any evidence of paying a mortgage?

I hope this works out but it may be that you are not entitled to anything. In which case you need income to squirrel away.

Urgent. Legal. Advice.

Speak to a lawyer. Find out if you are legally entitlrd to anything and if you aren't then i guess plead to his conscious to pay you back anything. As for how you got ibto this,naivity, vulnerability? Impulsiveness? Scammed you? I dont know but try and be practical now and get legal advice.

You'll have to have proof that you've contributed to changes to the house , like a new kitchen , double glazing etc...if you can do that then you stand a chance of getting something from this...if not then it's going to be very difficult to prove in court that you've a vested interest in the property.
I would consult a solicitor has soon has possible to see what your options are...just be warned it will be costly.
I'm sorry you're going through this, I had virtually the same happen to me and now I'm living in a rented property with very little savings....I'm trying to rebuild my life and please know that you can as well if you have too...

He bought the house in cash no mortgage from the money he got from selling his house in London and he expects me to believe that an accountant told him to keep my name off the deeds, I don’t believe him at all , some reason he obviously thinks that he wants it all and I know this sounds extreme maybe but from when I found out I have just been slowly falling apart and he made it this way, so I’m going to have to just call it quits and just end it. That betrayal was probably the worst betrayal I’ve ever had done to me, I know that it may sound strange but I’m looking forward to living on my own.

I think you should try to talk to him before you leave , does he know how you feel ? Have you told him that because of his betrayal that you don't think you can carry on with the relationship? He needs to know all this otherwise you'll be leaving it all unsaid.

I know now that he did it for totally selfish reasons it’s just not worth fighting about because he made a choice and he chose to not have me on the deeds and that’s a him problem, I’ve left now and I’m totally broke and I’m sleeping on my friends sofa but I’m free and I don’t have to deal with his lies anymore.

So sorryOP.

Does he have a will? Has he protected you so you won't be homeless?

Sorry op, just read later posts. Hope you are ok.

Please know that you will get through this !! It will feel very overwhelming at times but you just have to get through one day at a time.
Surround yourself with people who love and care about you.
I'm sorry you're going through this, but this is the lowest you can get so the only way is up now ...I wish you all the best in your new journey ❤️

I’m sorry OP.

However, you should have been aware you weren’t on the deeds as you would have had to sign a transfer document as part of the purchase or transfer of equity.

If anyone else is unsure of their ownership of their property, just download a copy of your deeds from the Land Registry. The cost has recently gone up but it’s only £7.

Also good idea to check if the property is held as tenants in common or joint tenants to check what would happen to one party’s share if they die before you. This is even more important if you’re not married and there is no will.

I’ve so tired of trying to make him understand that all I want is peace of mind and the way he has been treating me is vile , I’m second guessing myself I used to be confident and I was with my family and just because we were laughing together I started crying because I felt like I was with the right people, I know it sounds silly but I used to be so confident, I’m living at my mums house until I get some money behind me and then get a flat but I’m not sad because for the past 7 years I’ve been grieving and knowing it’s over .

When it comes to property and money you'll see a very different side to people...not everyone has your moral compass I'm afraid.
You will get your confidence back, it will take time ...I thing being single and independent gives you a different kind of confidence.
Surround yourself with people who lift you up...and don't be so hard on yourself ...
Please know you will be ok ❤️...

He had me sign some papers at the time and I distinctly remember that I said that we had to cross the box that said tenants in common if he changed them or because I didn’t think he would do this to me I may have crossed the wrong box, it’s over now I got away and I’m so happy and free I may not have money but I’ve still got my soul and I sleep so much better now.

Do you have any copies of the paperwork?
Have you down loaded the title deeds from Land Registry?

You may already know there's no chance, but are you sure you've checked the title deeds? They will tell you for certain and you can have closure if you don't want to fight him in the courts.

I have lived a very different life than many people I was on my way to University but I chose to not go, leave home at 17 and get a flat and then I fell into the world of drugs, I moved to London and then was put on Methadone and that isn’t even 1% of the things that I have done, always working but always taking drugs and moving from squat to squat and one day I met him and he was even worse, so I didn’t know what you were supposed to do when you brought a house and I never ever thought that we would be in that position and I trusted him but with one move he shattered that trust.