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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is my best friend jealous??

4 replies

bananahammok · 22/12/2024 04:12

I have twin boys who are 5 and my best friend has a15yr old son. Sadly his dad wasn't around as she was the "other woman" and wanted her to have a termination. My son's dad wasn't around as we've not gotten on due to some of his past behaviours. Recently, we went to court and ironed some things out. He has now started to see the boys and to be honest, he's appearing to be a great dad. I can't fault him at the moment. He's also speaking to me in a very respectful way and we are co parenting well. We met up for a chat and I saw none of the hostility and arrogance he used to be unable to hide. We spoke for an hour and (although I'm waiting to see a long pattern of consistent good behaviour from him) it's looking promising. This is something I've longed for as it's been so stressful and my boys need a dad to teach them how to be men.
I saw my best friend this afternoon and I explained to her how the coffee meet up went and as I was telling her, she rolled her eyes and just remarked that he makes her sick and she said he was disgusting. I'm confused by this. Why would she respond n in this way to such a positive turn of events?

OP posts:
Pumpkinpie1 · 22/12/2024 04:25

You’ve probably been her confidant for years, telling all about his poor behaviour
Now you are telling her he’s dad of the year
Shes entitled to feel sceptical.

I hope things continue to work well for you , but don’t blame your friend for being a friend

CuriousGeorge80 · 22/12/2024 04:30

She presumably assumes (quite reasonably) that he will become a dickhead again before long. Hopefully he won't but he likely will.

ForFunAmberDeer · 22/12/2024 04:37

I don't think she could be jealous of a man being courteous to you for an hour when you have raised his twin children for 5 years tbh as others have said she has likely heard everything from you about his previous poor behaviour and v rationally on that basis has no faith in him. Hopefully he'll prove her wrong, but I would say jealous is v far from her thinking.

Moro93 · 22/12/2024 04:47

There’s nothing to indicate that she’s jealous from what you’ve posted. It sounds like she’s just sceptical that he’s suddenly done a 180 when he hasn’t bothered before. It actually sounds like you need to be a bit more cautious and not get your hopes up.

“my boys need a dad to teach them how to be men”.

I also found the above quote from your post to be very strange and old fashioned…

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