Co parenting/harrasment

[Hazelcupboard]

Story is to long to tell

Ex partner (babys father) got charged with stalking and harrasment on me back in July

He didn't get a sentence but had a fine, and probation

No protection towards me at all

Since then we've actually co parented "ok"

Not the best but not the worst

Past few weeks he's started romatancising our relationship again

I've nipped it in the bud and since then I've been having threats like "I'm going to kill your next boyfriend"
"I'm coming to yours now to cause murder"
"I'll sit outside yours until you talk to me"

I've rung police on him today and they are coming to look at the text message proof

What do I do about the co parenting situation, I'm at a point I don't feel comfortable even speaking to him while handing my baby over to him anymore

I trust him with the baby but he never takes her and goes, he stands there demanding I talk to him like adults

I've made it clear I don't want him and he's not accepting it

I'm scared to go to court, he's a charmer, I'm worried he would get 50/50

Help

Is there a third party who could facilitate handovers?

Do you think he’d actually take you to court?

At the very least I would move to a co-parenting app and change your number. I would also move to 3rd party handover - this has the added benefit that it can be easier for the little one.

We tried third part hand over, worker for awhile but was effecting the people invovled days/plans

They also got sick of him telling them to pass on messages to me all the time so we had to put an end to that

Umm I think his family would encourage him and help him go to court

Contact centre.
Report everything to the police.
Apply for a non molestation order.
Contact paladin for advice and support.
How do you know he will bring your child back? He might say he’s only bringing your child back if you meet with him, etc.
Do you have a court order in place currently?
I would suggest that if you haven’t already, get a ring doorbell installed.
This man sounds dangerous. The type that would think if I can’t have you, no one can.
Take his threats as real.
This is post separation abuse. Contact women’s aid for support too.
Ask the police to put a tag on your address so that if he shows up and you call them they will come out as a matter of urgency.
Keep your doors locked at all times. If he comes to your home don’t answer and immediately call the police.

https://www.paladinservice.co.uk

Personally I think you need to change your mindset of co parenting. You simply can't do it with a twat.

Take the lead and gain control of your life.. If he gets to see his dc he is very lucky imo. Offer up days and times that suit your /dc's schedule.. If he can't make it that's on him not you. Don't keep offering up alternatives... You are entitled to raise your dc to benefit your mh as the main carer. He isn't able to dictate when dc relies ultimately on you. He isn't to be trusted or relied upon is he?

This with bells on

Co-parenting app that is submissible in court. All comms via there. Change your number or block him. You can't co-parent with these arseholes. Next time he texts reply with "do not contact me again". Nothing else. If he continues to do so, it's enough for arrest.

I strongly advise that you keep a record of everything that he does. Keep a record of conversations, text messages, anything and everything. These things are what you will present in court and if you do this, they will no choice but to grant you full custody. They are going to do what is in the best interest of the child and he sounds like he's too dangerous to be around him or you so it's in your best interest to not have any contact with this man.
These threats about murder and stalking you are serious threats and should be taken very seriously. And they will be if you follow through with everything that you are told. You may want to file a civil protection order against him as well which will make sure he suffers consequences if he violates the order or does something crazy.
You're doing great with every step you have already taken, and since you have taken certain steps to protect yourself from him, you have to understand that you must continue and keep doing whatever the law requires for you to keep yourself safe and so they can also protect you.
Goodluck, be strong, and best wishes to you!!

Police have been and advised to go completely no contact with him

They've referred me to womans aid as apparently womans aid can help with child arrangements (not heard that before) but until then go no contact

They will be going to have words of advice with him but no arrest will be made as technically there were not threats made TODAY, which I guessed would happen

Will be doing exactly this, the amount of times he TELLS me "I'll have the baby tomorrow if that's alright" um no u wont