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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Attracted to my friend but don’t think she feels the same

5 replies

Swirlystar · 21/12/2024 14:06

I’m divorced and a factor in my divorce was my sexuality. I’ve been divorced around three years and in that time I’ve not met anyone or attempted to meet anyone because of my own dc and I’ve not been interested.

however I’ve recently met someone through work. We’ve been friends for about six months and we spend a lot of time together in and out of work. She is bi and has told me she has a sort of ‘situation’ with one of her best friends. She is very attracted to this woman and they have slept together previously. They are now ‘just friends’ but I think my friend would probably like more.

It is confusing to me because she will say she likes spending time with me more than annyone and that we laugh a lot. She will say she misses me if we don’t see each other for a day and we message / call a lot. There is some flirting sometimes but because we work together I’ve never suggested I feel anything other than friendship - and also I know she’s attracted to this other woman who is loads prettier and 3 years younger than me. So I sort of feel she’s out of my league I guess?
At times I’ve felt there’s ‘something’ there but then my friend is very chatty and sociable so it’s really hard to know.

Im best to leave this one, right?

OP posts:
BlushPine · 21/12/2024 14:08

Absolutely leave it. You don’t need that much complication in a first post-marriage, first same-sex relationship.

redboxer321 · 21/12/2024 14:13

Yep, sound like a player. Sorry OP.

DeliciousApples · 21/12/2024 14:41

Dating colleagues you work with is never a good idea.

Bluestarling · 21/12/2024 19:00

Put it on a back burner for now. Get a circle of LGBT pals and see how life unfolds

Winter2020 · 21/12/2024 19:03

She likes spending time with you
But has told you she is attracted to the woman she is seeing.

Sounds like a friend to me.

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