Empty Ester’s, is your husband a bit of an arsehole when the kids come home?

[Coalplay]

Okay, so he loves his kids, obviously, but whenever they come home, he turns into such a curmudgeon. Moaning about things being left in place all being done a different way lights turned on. It’s like a stereotype.

Please tell me your husband’s like this.

empty nest ers

Mine is! He wasn’t like this at all when they lived here, but since they moved out it’s as though they’re invading his territory when they visit. It’s bizarre and really bloody annoying!

It’s really annoying, isn’t it?, he’s now ranting about the toilet being broken or something. It’s so fucking OAP.

Oh yes. He’s an exH now but this sounds familiar. Common complaints were thermostats being adjusted, lights being on, noises from people moving around upstairs, talking to friends 🙄
He’d also start nagging them to do things within ten minutes of them coming home - things like going through a box of stuff from when they were in Reception and telling them to sort out what they wanted to keep and what could be thrown out.

No. That would be me. I love having my home for just me and dh, when the dc come home it's hard to adapt.

Not an empty nester but I think it would be me doing the moaning 🤣

Yep this is me, I would never moan out loud but I do find it hard sharing my space again.
DH loves having the DCs home!

No! We’re both delighted to see them, and he’s much more of a softie about offering lifts etc than when they were at home.

They are also SO much tidier now, and help out more willingly now they have to do everything themselves normal. They even unload the dishwasher without being asked.

They are also more appreciative of the things we do for them - just normal stuff - now they have experienced the grind of shopping, cooking, washing up, cleaning, doing laundry etc.

No, we both love having them home and spoiling them completely.

lots of cooking, favourite foods, chats and non stop sport on TV.

I always felt very unwelcome. Spoilt any relationship going forwards.

It’s me that gets pissed off with all that - my DH is an indulgent old sod when it comes to his kids.

No! DD is in her second year at uni and DH was up at the crack of dawn to go and bring her home for Xmas. He can't wait to have her home and hang out with her - she is lovely company though.

He’s more rational than me with them, I’m a complete pushover. I think he’s slightly jealous too but does his best to mask it (they are his step kids).

I’m not saying my children aren’t lovely company ! Lol
and that he didn’t drive 6 hours in a day to get one

but he just turns into an arse

Make them feel unwelcome now they will be distant in later life

Uni holidays are much longer than they used to be?

aren’t kids home half the year now?

I guess it’s in the on off nature of it.

You get into a routine, then it’s disrupted.

Perhaps it’s also natures way of clearing the nest, permanently!

Theres nothing like having your M&D nag you about various things once you’re in your 20s to make you feel like it’s time to get a place of your own.

Totally agree.

No love them coming back even dsd who is super messy. Relatively recent that they have all gone though. I do think it may change over time.

Ultimately you get used to having the place to yourselves and your ways

our friends had there 2 kids come back from uni in Covid after living away from home
she said they’d never fallen out so much in all there life