I haven't had the best relationships in my life. Domestic abuse from different exes in different forms. My DS dad i left almost 10 years ago. In that time I've had 1 other serious relationship which was 4 years. It wasn't obviously abusive but losts of harsh comments, didn't feel appreciated. I stopped putting effort into the relationship because I thought why should I and I eventually break it off. I left that relationship mentally 2 years previously.
I've done alot of work. I've been following the burned haystack method. Trying to find a needle in a haystack with OLD.
Ive matched with someone. I actually do know him from years ago, we had briefly spoke maybe a few times maybe 10 years or so ago.
Anyway he seems like the most nicest guy. Texts me when he's out and says he will reply later and he's not ignoring me off his own back. Offering to get something for me which I needed last min to save me going out. I didn't take him up on the offer but I thought it was sweet. No sexual chat, a bit flirty but nothing that's pushing anything.
Is this how nice men act? I'm so used to awful men that I don't know what nice is.
Usually when I've had a lovely kind man in the past I've self sabotaged and found them "boring". When actually I now know its stability and calm. It doesn't have to be big gestures and ups and downs.