TW mentions CSA Is it too much to expect?

[Twosheetsinplenty]

TW mentions child abuse from the start.

My brother abused my sister and me as children. It was prolonged and there was rape involved with my sister, it was less prolonged and no rape involved with me.

My parents have never really faced up to the enormity of what my brother did, they avoided dealing with the situation, still have a good relationship with my brother and basically their denial and minimisation pushed me out of my family and to a certain extent my extended family.

My siblings no longer have contact with the abuser brother but they have always supported my parents in their course of action towards me.

My brother said to me that it was too much to expect my parents to address what the abuser brother had done and it was too much to expect that he would not support his parents?

Is it too much to expect?

Obviously my family is extremely dysfunctional but since literally everyone in the large extended family has gone along with it to maintain their relationships then am I just expecting too much?

Hopeful bump it will help to correct my confused thinking on this.

Is it too much to expect?

No, it's not.

So sorry this happened (and is still happening) to you.

since literally everyone in the large extended family has gone along with it to maintain their relationships

I've seen this time and time again on here.

It's sick.

Unfortunately it seems to be common human behaviour.

I'm sorry this happened. It's not unusual at all for families to completely gloss over abuse by a member of the family and ostracise the victim.

You present a threat and hold up a mirror to their dysfunction. Dealing with your brother's behaviour would mean dealing with their inability to protect you.

I wouldn't blame you for going no contact but that's not always possible, especially if you don't want to lose your whole family.

You might find specialized counselling helpful in processing this and making a decision on what to do.

Some organisations that you might find helpful:

NAPAC is an organisation for survivors of childhood abuse.

The Survivors Trust is an organisation for survivors of sexual abuse and CIS'ters for women who have survived sexual abuse by a family member.

Thanks everyone. I appreciate your replies.