Tell me about messaging a guy and then instantly regretting it

[Derogations]

Please tell me your ‘Shouldn’t have sent that’ message stories.

I am so close to a ‘Hey, how are you?’ but …. best if I don’t

All the women who contact the guy to ask if he’s ok or to invite him for sth after he has gone silent/messy on them

DON’T. Really. Except inviting an half-arse to do a number on you or keep the charade going a bit longer with a coward, it brings nothing.

My sympathies. Sit on your hands and do not text. Imagine all scenarios especially him not responding. That will make you feel a whole lot worse than how you're feeling just now. Be strong x

Don’t do it!! Instead write us (or just yourself) a list of all the shitty things he has done. We will help you find your resolve to stay silent.

Without knowing the circumstances, my general advice would be to listen to your gut and don't message.
If he was into you 'enough', you'd know. You wouldn't have to send tentative texts to test the water.
Too shabby for you. You want to be adored don't you?

We need more context. What’s the point of initiating the conversation? If it’s for them to notice you then be bolder. My advice would be to confident an example of something I’ve done in the past is commented on a post of a Starbucks saying “overpriced coffee” to get a reaction. We chatted for a few weeks after although it didn’t go anywhere but I enjoyed the flirtatious banter. This guy would post expensive eatery places and I’d say “next time you’ll have to take me.” It was just part of the fun. Not sure why people care so much about what others think be yourself if they don’t like you it’s their loss.

I have a feeling OP means sending a message to a guy she has slightly negative history with rather than starting up a conversation with someone new.

Depends on context. Only message I feel a bit cringe about is sending a pretend 'by mistake' text or two to someone I was really into but treated me quite shittily. Nothing awful happened and there was plausible deniability as he has my brother's name but I wish I'd kept my dignity in full.

No because I find chasing people who don't want me embarrassing.

I agree with not chasing (especially after above!). But if the context is that you cooled it or you lost touch for reasons other than dates fizzling or going sour then advice may be different.

Don’t do it. Keep your pride and dignity. If necessary delete his number.

I dumped him. Still was sorry to see him go though. Feeling weak but also… he has info on something I want.

Well done you actually want him back or just the thing you want? Don't reel someone back in whom you dumped unless you're certain you want to try again.

Do*

Definitely do not want anything to happen but <sigh> it is quite engaging and there is lots of drama and …and … and

So you're bored? Address that.

Was this a major fall out or a spat?
Do you think he would be receptive?
When was this dumping, do you think enough time has passed?

I go against Mumsnet grain, reach out ... Lifes too short for regrets by being stubborn.

You know what … I messaged and … got the info! It was worth it

Haha fair enough. Onwards.