Apologies for the long post...
Almost 39 years old, premature menopause, severe endometriosis and awaiting a hysterectomy (despite me begging they won't let me have HRT before the op so I'm literally rattling with the amount of supplements I'm taking).
Bit of background: I'm late diagnosed ND, had a vulnerable childhood and used to be an extreme people pleaser. Because of that I've slept with a lot more people than I wish I had, but can't say I ever particularly enjoyed it (or was sober even). Three serious relationships a) childhood sweetheart, sex was fine but nothing really to compare it to at that point b) violent abusive psychopath who wouldn't take no for an answer, even if tears and pain were involved c) cheated on me repeatedly because of my endo, despite me never saying no to him he couldn't understand why some positions were sometimes painful (or why he couldn't have anal sex every single time).
Had a brief fling last year where I felt that I finally enjoyed having sex and was a bit 'saucy' or whatever I can call it. Since then the menopause symptoms have kicked in and I'm really not feeling any drive whatsoever.
But here's the thing - I've actually met someone I like and would like to start dating him. We've been flirty but I've also been honest about things and especially my upcoming operation (in my eyes I don't know why anyone would get involved only to play nursemaid, and he said he's not 100% sure what it will mean so I'm hesitant anyway). But I don't know if I should just forget it given I think my chance for a fulfilling sex life has failed.
Any advice/ideas/things that would help would be greatly appreciated. I don't really have anyone in real life I can talk to about this.