My friend is 44, single with no children. In lockdown she started a relationship with an ex school classmate. He preyed on her and started a relationship with her days after her mum died.
He turned out to be a drug addict, alcoholic and domestic abuser. She told me she knew he was a drug addict and alcoholic as he told her on their few dates but continued with him! She moved him into her dad’s house as she lives there without even asking her dad. This ex ended up buying an XL Bully and brought that to the house even though the dad said no dogs.
One time she went to his mother’s house and he barricaded her in after his drug binge and she had to flee and drive home. He followed her home driving drugged up and drunk and the dad phoned the police about domestic abuse and got him arrested. He has sweared at various family members and had arguments with them.
One time the dad had to go and stay with his other daughter while her and her nasty ex who she was with at the time stayed in his house! I told her off and said you should never have sided with that druggie over your dad, it is his house.
They finally split up just over a year ago. Her ex kept harassing me and I had a go at him and blocked him as he asked me out and said inappropriate comments knowing I was in a relationship.
Her sister is really worried and phoned me and said this ex has worked his way back and took shopping round to her house as she has ‘covid’. Her sister saw him on the house cameras they have fitted as the dad has dementia now so my friend is caring for him. She also saw my friend has been messaging him when she went to show her something WhatsApp. Other friends have raised concerns to her sister.
My friend can’t cope. She is still grieving her mother who passed 2 and a half years ago which is understandable as her mum was so lovely. Her dad went downhill when the mum passed. My friend hasn’t worked for years and has had counselling and been on anti depressants.
I try and be there for her as much as I can but I said to her sister that myself and her sister work full time and we have other commitments so we will need external support as we are not qualified. I took my friend to a social group a few weeks ago to get her out and everyone loved her but she won’t go alone to anymore meets in the day.
She seems to think the solution to her problems is meet a rich man and move in with him but most men want a woman with ambition.
I don’t know what to do as going back to this domestic abuser is really dangerous and she is vulnerable.