Your perspective please?

[Lewis22]

Hi,
I am sure this topic has probably been posted here before, but wanted to ask your thought please?

Currently dealing with disrespectful behavior from male partner in the form of letching and ogling other females while in my company...yes, this is not a quick glance here and there, this is obvious staring and checking out.

I have spoken with him regarding this issue and it did stop for a while, then started back up again, he tries now to do it discreetly when he thinks I am not looking, & no, this is in no way down to jealousy on my part, I find it totally disrespectful to both myself and feel it is objectifying the women in question,and can feel myself cringing when it happens.

Anyone here dealt with similar??

Haven’t experienced it myself but would absolutely give me the ick.

He Sounds like a complete dick. Don’t put up with it.

Nope, not had it. But he'd be an ex partner.

You made your feelings clear, and he's still doing it. Just get rid - he won't change.

Why are you still with someone who has so little respect for you (or indeed, other women)?

Bin

What a creep , l don't know how you can bear to be with him OP .

Tbh OP if that's the type of man he is then I doubt he will change.

It's so disrespectful that he does this even when you are present. And begs the question of how does he behave when you are not there?
Some men are just constantly " window shopping " for some one " better". Some men I think do it deliberately as a form of destroying their partner's self esteem and keeping them their place.
I think you either need to accept that this is what he is like and put up with it. Or finish your relationship and hopefully meet someone who isn't constantly perving over other women. I know which I'd do.

I honestly don't know the answer to be fair

I could not /would not stay with a man like this,i can't imagine ever wanting sex with someone like him ,yuk.
He clearly has no respect for you or any other woman and i would think it's likely he would shag someone else given half a chance without giving you a second thought.
Please dump and don't look back.

It's disrespectful, ditch him, it'll be the best upgrade you can do for yourself.

My ex used to do this on purpose to upset me, along with the whole wide eyed denial. Yours is probably doing it on purpose too. Mine never got confronted by an angry husband for it because he was very careful about who he oggled.

The real issue if that he wants to upset you. And it can be addictive to get a buzz out of upsetting someone. Sounds like it’s time for him to be an ex partner and he can ogle to his hearts content.

I just honestly don't get it, yes we all notice others sometimes, but this is another level. he now tries to be more discreet, but it is still obvious. Why would someone do something like that deliberately??

Because he’s an arsehole. I don’t know how long you’ve been with him but the longer you stay with a man like this, the more your self esteem will be crushed. Don’t try to understand it or make it logical. He’s just an arsehole who sees women as meat. It’s as simple as that. You can do better.

Because he can that is why.

so why are you with him if you honestly do not know the answer?.

He thinks women are just tits and ass, he has no respect for you, chuck him asap

Never with a partner. Because that level of interest in women, that meant he couldn't concentrate on anything else if an attractive one was in the vicinity, would be a huge red flag for me due to the preoccupation and lack of self control. So I'd have binned off a leerer pretty quick. I had a male friend who did it though. He was single and literally obsessed. It got so I'd not go out with him as I was too ashamed of him. The clincher was when I caught two women pulling sick faces after him. I was mortified to be associated with him.

They do get a sadistic kick out of unfortunately, and also to bully you into having low self esteem, it inflates their ego especially if the passing woman seems chuffed with the attention, they know what they are doing and still choose to do it.
I had one ex that did this and 💯 certain to upset me, he went as far as striking up conversations with other random women while we were out and pretend he was chatty to everyone, I'd pretend not to care and he'd try and provoke me by asking if I was jealous, honestly I wish I had the courage to end it the first time, as it didn't get any better, I had suspicions he was chatting to other women on his phone too.

Bin him.

Oh lord, your friend sounds familiar. I just don't get why they have to act in such an immature manner, I am literally cringing just thinking about it 😩

Absolutely unbelievable the way they behave! In one way I find it amusing because it is so laughable!! in a sad sort of way.

I wouldn't tolerate it. Not out of jealousy but rather the fact it's just completely gross. Any man who is "letching and ogling" women has no respect for them.

'Why he does it' is because he's a wanker.
Why you put up with it is for you to work out 💐

I'd deal with it by ending the relationship. The only option.

Tell him he’ll get his face slapped one day.
Some men seem drawn to staring at boobs like they’re 8 year old boys seeing them for the first time.

Had this with an ex and it was a horrible feeling, makes you feel so inadequate and shit. It was one of lots of things wrong in the relationship but we were just not compatible.