A very long time freind of mine has separated from her husband and left the marital home. She was a sahm for 20 odd years, she has kids from early teen to early 20s. She has nothing. No savings. No job. No income besides a small amoubt of UC. She does have the right to half the family home when she divorces. She had to leave because the arguments were awful and he refused to leave the house.
I have a spare back room which she's been staying in for the last few months. I dont ask for anything in return. She goes over and visits the kids/makes dinner. One of her kids i think is ND and in extreme stress over her leaving and having to stay with the dad. Hes harming himself physically. A prime source of their arguments was her dh felt she should have gone back to work long ago. He's critical, puts her down, criticises the kids etc. I love her dearly but...over the last couple of months I'm starting to question her priorities.
She's done very little in terms of finding work, gets distracted easily, has done nothing towards figuring out how to initiate a divorce and therefore have access to shared assets. She spends time meditating, she's gone on a whole day long meditation thing this weekend. I've never had a bad word to say about her before but at the moment I'm finding myself feeling angry, and like shaking her to come to her senses. I dont want to ruin a freindship, how do I broach this? I really feel she needs to wake up and act to get herself financially stable so she can provide a home for her kids.