Long story short, I moved into a new place about 2 months ago. I’m sharing with one woman (late 20s) and am early 30s so about 4 years between us.
She hasn’t houseshared since university days and is married and from a different country, currently here for work without her husband. She speaks English well but sometimes there is a slight barrier. Anyway we got on really well when I moved in and I cooked dinner a couple of times. She did a few really kind favours for me as well and all seemed good. We’re both tidy and clean and very quiet around the house. Worth saying she is subleasing my room to me via the landlord so neither of us own the property.
fast forward to a few weeks later, I’m away for a week and her husband is there visiting so I give them some space. I brought them some chocolate back from my holiday and had a big chat with both of them. All good. I then don’t see her for about a week as we keep ourselves to ourselves and start getting snotty text messages about leaving lights on in the hallway when I’m in my bedroom and running the dishwasher when there is still some space in there. I did take these points onboard and apologised / stopped doing it.
im a bit shocked as feel like I’ve been kind and friendly so not really appreciating the pass agg texts. She is generally always at home and doesn’t have friends in this country whereas I’m out most evenings. I had invited her to do things but as soon as her tone changed I didn’t really want to see her in my free time!
We haven’t seen even other again for a week as I’ve been out a lot and went away for the weekend. I sent her a text saying I’d buy some stuff for the bathroom and asking after her, then another one saying I’d cleaned the flat and shall we do an alternating rota. Got another snotty message back saying she cleans frequently and doesn’t want to do a rota. It’s annoying because I’m generally the one taking the bins out / doing stuff behind the scenes but feel like she is claiming the moral high ground and implying I do less.
i invited her for a coffee to catch up this weekend but she said she had a tennis lesson (all weekend lol?) so didn’t know when she would be home. I’m a bit confused by the change in atmosphere / friendliness on her part which all seems to be since her husband came over. I don’t know what I could be doing differently or how I could make it better. Can someone please advise? I’m looking to buy soon so this is a temporary arrangement but it’s winding me up!