Fiancé called me fat/ugly

[mjbtx]

I’m not sure what to do.
I’m 6 months pp after having my third baby with my partner. There is only 13 months between my 2nd and 3rd baby so my body took a big hit with it which I am aware of

i have completely lost myself in motherhood and I don’t even dare look in the mirror anymore,

me and my partner was arguing and in the argument he called me a fat ugly bitch.
ive not spoken a single word to him and I don’t plan on doing so

im scared to raise 3 children alone but can’t do this relationship anymore

He needs to be your Ex.

I'm so sorry he has been vile.

Do you have supportive family or friends?

Do you have support OP? Family or friend?

You can't stay with this man and lead a happy life for you or your kids.

I have family members but I wouldn’t want to burden them with my problems as they all have enough on themself.
I don’t have any friends as I distanced myself once I became a mother

What is your financial and housing position? I ask as you aren't married, so likely very vulnerable. Wishing you strength to get through this situation. BTW, did he apologise (not that this makes a real difference)?

We private rent from a family member . But I do some office jobs for her to get my own income but I pay for a lot of things in the house,bills,food etc
he works full time but I still pay for pretty much everything. He sends me money for rent that’s all

thats why the argument started in the first place as I wanted to know where his money was going

Is the rental in your name from your family member?

Both names on tenancy

See a lawyer he’s got obligations to support his children. Sounds toxic you’d be happier out of it.

Congratulations on your baby, OP. I know how you feel, I also had a whole bunch of children very close in age! It's lovely watching them grow together and I've never regretted it. I am so sorry that your partner is being unsupportive. You and your children are at your most vulnerable and he has shown that he doesn't have what it takes to be supportive. Also worrying is what he is doing with his money. I would make plans to become even more self-sufficient with a view to ending the relationship once you feel stronger. Don't let him ruin your enjoyment of your children.

He's not even remotely a partner; he's a sperm donor. You need to accept that you'll be building a life without him.

Three children by a tosser who doesn't love you and doesn't support them?? Better contact CMS. And perhaps Women's Aid.

Your family member or his?
You'd be much better off on your own than with someone who chooses to speak to you like that.

Those words are unpleasant but seems the issue is much deeper and finances are out of hand. Name calling because he feels guilty and knows he's in the wrong. You need to get things together to separate - get him out of the house to start.

Ask your family member to end the joint tenancy and let you have it in your name.

You need to make a universal credit claim as a single parent and CMS.

Start living as a single parent today no more laundry, cooking or cleaning for him. Draw up a rota for when each of you is responsible for the DC.

If you want to get him off the tenancy ask your relative to remove him and issue you both a section 21 whilst it's still possible. She can give you a new contract without his name on. After the new legislation comes in this would not be possible so you need to explain to your relative and ask them to help you now. He will never make you feel happy loved and cherished after that.

I thought I’d do an update.

i did discover he was watching slots videos on YouTube he was talking to women through live chats on that and also on discord so if he can go to that extent to cheat then I’m 99% sure it’s other things aswell.

I did get pure ick after seeing it and did ask him to leave and he actually did go

i have done no contact and will talk about the kids through his mum as I know he will try to get back in but I can’t do it anymore

Sorry you’re going through this but breaking up with him is for the best. Hope you can stay where you are longer term. Is it your relatives property or his? Can you get him removed from tenancy? Things will be hard before it gets better but dont take him back. You deserve better!

So he was financially abusing you as well as being cheating scum.

Call the police is he gives you any hassle.
You can do this.