Hi, I was just wondering what everyone's views were on this were?
I have met a lovely man, and we are totally in love, he has been married twice, one cheated on him and the other had a drink problem in the end and was going through a lot of issues with her family. He ended up leaving the house to this ex mother of his son and she took quite a chunk out of his pension but since then he has been able to get it back and earn it back himself as he works hard, earns a three figure salary, owns a house etc and very stable. So for him he isnt phased by loss more so she took a lot!!
I have never been married, engaged twice but not gone through with either, he has lost more financially than I have, when I left my last ex, I just didnt sign anything when we bought our house and ended up having to give him my deposit for a house, when we old our house a few years ago.
Since then my dad is forever saying ok next time you buy with anyone, sign something which makes sense and I said I would.
My partner now is very fair with his exes and generous as well as with myself on all accounts. However I am more cautious.
I have a house with a few hundred equity in it and my parents are financially secure too, they would leave me a lot also, so i would say we are kind of equal but I just dont earn as much as he does. I also dont have a pension just my house and parents inheritance which is a lot too and would give me a nice future.
Now i mentioned a pre nup, he has said no it doesnt matter, as this makes out I can see us splitting up, I said no its because of what I lost with the house re the ex, he said well I lost more and was still fair after my 15 year marriage. He doesnt seem to be too phased by signing anything, whereas even though I have kind of less, he says whats his is mine and wants to build a future.
I cant seem to get past this and its kind of bothering me plus I like to be sensible.
Any suggestions how to approach it without falling out lol.