My Fiance doesn't want to a baby with me but tried for a baby with a stranger on a break

[Stef246]

Me and my fiance have been together 4.5 years. Last year was very much on and off due to me losing my mum and our baby, the grief consumed me and he just didn't understand. Jan 2024 we called it quits but got back together early may.
I knew he was dating someone while we were apart however swore to me nothing more than a kiss happened. Fast forward to October, wedding planned, deposit paid and I find out not only did he have sex with her, bit they tried for a baby after 2 months of knowing eachother. He claims he was just trying to move on from me and wasn't in his right mind.
Now he's claiming he's not ready for a baby, despite how much I want it and fact we are getting married next August. Can't help but wonder if he just doesn't want a baby with me....after our loss last year he knows how much I want and need this.
I don't know what to do. I'm angry he lied about sleeping with her 2, as it was unprotected I've know got to go get tested also.

@Stef246 im so sorry for your losses. It probably feels like you want to hang on to him as he’s familiar and you have a shared loss but he wasn’t there for you in your greatest time of need. Yes he no doubt was dealing in his own way with the loss of the baby but it doesn’t excuse his treatment of you. He risked your health by having unprotected sex and not telling you, that in itself is hugely disrespectful and selfish. Paired with the fact he abandoned you when you needed him the most and flippantly decided to conceive a child with a woman he just met, he really doesn’t sound like he deserves you or is mature enough to be a parent.

When you commit to a partner by choosing to marry them, that means you choose them every day, even when things are tough. He ran out because he didn’t want to deal with the hard times. I think your desire for a child is perhaps clouding your judgement on his suitability to be a good partner and father - will he run out again if your child has a disability, if you get sick or lose your job? You needed him and he failed you, at least he’s now saving you from a potential future heartache by putting the brakes on. Take this as an opportunity to make think if he really is the one for you.