Am I a prude over his groping?

[Justpeachy88]

Does anyone else’s partners grope them in public? Ive just came back off holiday where I seemed to go away with a different version of my partner. From the moment we got there, he’s groping my bum constantly walking down the street, while the kids are there… we’re in the queue for the food in front of all the hotel guests he walks past and gives me a bum squeeze, I find it embarrassing…and squeezing my boobs while sat down next to each other, no care for who’s around!
Several times I’ve asked him to stop because I feel
like a piece of meat and he’s then turned frosty on me only for him to do it again a few hours later! I’m wondering if it’s me being uptight?

There’s a time and place for me and it’s not while eating dinner in front of people while his hand is riding up my thigh to my groin area! He doesn’t do this day to day so I’m definitely confused, it’s nice to be found attractive and I guess a night out would be maybe a different situation (even though that would still make me uncomfortable) but it was a family holiday. He’s not speaking to me now because he said I’ve been frosty and he’s sick of it.

Happy with a kiss here and there which there has been none by the way. I think holding hands is nice too. I’m back to the usual version now we’re home, I’m definitely confused.

And doing it in front of the kids - that's child abuse in my opinion to add to the list of this prince amongst men's charms.

I'd punch my DH in the eye if he did this.

No that is not normal! Tell him it's unacceptable and upsetting you, you find it hugely insane embarrassing. Oh and a massive turnoff!

Thank you for all of the replies. I think it’s more the fact I’ve pointed out that I don’t like it and he carries on. I even took his hand and moved it off my body or squeeze my legs together so he’s well aware I don’t like it.

It’s definitely pushed me away, I’ve tried to talk about it properly but he won’t, he walks away because he said I’ve made him feel rejected which makes me feel guilty. There was a spare seat next to me on the plane so I moved over one to try and get some sleep and he kept rubbing his hand up my thigh! I told him to stop as I need rest. He got up and moved to the other row across the aisle from me after swapping with the kids and left me traipsing behind at the airport. Sad end to the holiday really when it would otherwise have been lovely.

My friend's husband was like this in company, he couldn't stop mauling her. She found out he was seeing another woman and felt the groping was a crude way of trying to hide his infidelity. Do you think your partner could have a wandering eye?

He's marking his territory so everyone knows you belong to him, like a dog peeing up a lamp post.

Utterly disrespectful and repellent behaviour.

What a knobhead he is.

You are a person with bodily autonomy. As his partner you are supposedly somebody whose feelings he cares about.

And actually, YES, you ARE rejecting him in that moment, because you have every right to bodily autonomy. HE put himself in the position of being rejected, because you've told him plenty of times that you don't want him to grope you in public. He can sulk like a kid but it's an own goal because what grown woman finds sulking and storming off a turn on?!

He wants you to not hurt his feelings, but he's repeatedly showing you that he thinks jack shit of respecting yours.

Honestly, I'd be furious with him.

Oh wow really, I hadn’t thought of this at all. I’m not sure, he hasn’t given me any reason to think he has to be honest.

I'd would slap his fucking face every time.

Is it because he's drinking? I could see that making some people more touchy feely, but he shouldn't do it in public in front of the kids if you don't like it. I have the opposite issue in that my fella never really likes touching me or showing affection in public or otherwise. I wouldn't mind a bum grope here and there. But grabbing your boobs seems a bit excessive! It might teach your kids it's a good way to show affection is to grab arses and boobs. Which could end in tears. Hopefully he'll appreciate that it's not a good influence. But he sounds like he's not that bothered sadly.

I'm not surprised you feel like a piece of meat, because that's exactly how he's treating you. Few posts on here have made me feel quite as nauseated as this one.

How dare he assert his ownership of your body parts in this way. Let him be frosty. If I was you I would totally stop having any sex with him whatsoever until he listens to you laying down your boundaries.

What a pathetic immature man child he is. Sulking because you say no to bring groped like a piece of meat.
Sorry but he sounds a revolting sex pest

A misjudged pat on the bum is one thing but basically, at this level, he's assaulting you. What's he and your marriage generally like the rest of the time? You say he's never like this at home? Does he always do this when he's on holiday or been drinking or is this the first time? Another poster mentioned another woman and this could be one answer. How's your sex life generally? Maybe he thinks a bit of sun and sangria will improve things.

Just to repeat, what others have said, no, no, no, it’s sexual assault. I’m so sorry @Justpeachy88 . 💐

My DH is like this, not so much going for the groin but always touching my boobs or asking if he can feel them. If he goes for a cuddle before work for example he'll put his hands on my boobs rather than round me, I'm fucking sick of it. There's never any affection it's just constant grabbing at me and then he wonders why I don't want him near me. I find I now quickly get changed when he's out of the room coz I know if he sees me with no bra he'll start trying to paw me. It's exhausting

Ugh.

He sounds 16! I wouldn’t like this either, far too horny harry for me. I just don’t want to be grabbed at, especially on a family holiday. Also, getting in a mard when asked not to do it is equally as off putting. There are other ways to show you’re attracted to someone without it looking like a scene off Kevin & Perry.

🤮it’s so tiring isn’t it. My ex used to do it & in the end, I didn’t get changed in front of him or wear anything that showed any flesh. It was relentless & exhausting. In the end, I just saw him as a sleaze.

But why did you wait until the end to see him as sleazy? That should've been apparent right from the start.

There’s never a time and a place for non-consensual groping. That’s just sexual assault and harassment. The fact he’s doing this in front of your children is particularly disgusting.

It’s not only exhausting it’s degrading and utterly disrespectful.

misogynistic and patriarchal, also sexual assault.

You need to put it to a stop for yourself and for other women. The more women stop tolerating This nonsense the better for all women across the world.

Women who tolerate this put other women in more jeopardy.

What example are you setting for your son or daughter?

I hope not and don't want to scare you but just wondered if you already suspected anything. My friend guessed immediately that he was up to no good so I think they make it obvious and you'd have noticed any wandering.

It’s disrespectful, it’s irrelevant whether you are a prude or not (I say not) if you ask your partner to stop pawing you in public it should stop. Shouldn’t have been doing it in the first place. Squeezing your breast in public is just degrading.

Several times I’ve asked him to stop because I feel like a piece of meat and he’s then turned frosty on me only for him to do it again a few hours later!

he sounds like an almighty sex pest who doesn't respect your personal boundaries even when you spell them out and sulks when he doesn't have his way. He thinks you're his property to do with as he wants.

men like that have an engrained misogynistic attitude that you'll never get rid of. Do you really want to spend the rest of your days battling his wandering hands? The fact you call it Groping says it all!