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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Suggestions to add day time excitement and spontaneity

4 replies

Ohitsallbull · 29/10/2024 11:27

When I met dh 6 year ago (second time marriage for us both in our 30’s) I was fun, spontaneous and exciting. I had lots of money and our children went to other parents every other weekend. We had the best time, city breaks, dirty weekends, last minute flights, great sex anywhere we could. Just really fun.

We both had dc with our previous relationships and decided neither of us wanted anymore as we enjoyed our child free weekends. But now our teen dc have decided they prefer to stay with us (apparently we have more fun) but never stay with their other parents all at the same time, so I feel I don’t get any adult time.

our sex life is near on non existent, the kids stay up as late as us.
i feel drained and not the person I was when we met, he is also stressed and money is tighter.

the 4 dc are 13-15 so not old enough to be left over night and also I wouldn’t leave them together as they argue or mess around with things they shouldn’t.
we can get days off work between school hours as work is flexible so I’m looking for suggestions of day time activities we could do after they have left for school to bring some excitement back

OP posts:
RavenA · 29/10/2024 12:16

You could always try a spa day together. Some are clothing optional.

Ohitsallbull · 30/10/2024 07:48

thank you @RavenA I go on spa days regularly with friends and not sure he would enjoy them but maybe the optional clothes one could be fun. Iv never been to one and didn’t know the uk had them (I knew Germany had naked saunas).
What are they like? Im not sure if I would enjoy them if it was for swinging but would enjoy the German style

OP posts:
Brananan · 30/10/2024 07:53

For better or for worse OP.

Plenty of us put that lifestyle away for a bit when we had kids then resumed it when the kids were old enough to be left.

ILiveInSalemsLot · 30/10/2024 08:09

Travel somewhere nearby you haven't been to before for brunch and a wander.
Ice skating
Climbing wall
Bike ride
Go somewhere green or the coast and do a walk (alltrails are good for showing some nice walks)
Watch a film in the cinema. There are screenings around 11am often.
Museum, gallery or exhibition

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