Would it be wrong to just have a bit of fun with a bloke?

[youonlyliveonce99]

Soo what do people think about having drama free fun with the opposite sex?

I'm 33 have children and I'm a single mum. I've been speaking to a bloke on and off the last year and he said about having drama free fun and I keep debating whether to do this because I just think why not? We are both attracted to each other and he said see what happens, meet up, have a laugh and if the sexual part happens it happens. He's been completely honest with me too and with how things have been with my life the last few years I feel like it would be fun. Obviously it would not be round my children and it would be in my spare time that I do rarely get but would it be soo bad to have fun with a bloke? Anyone else done this? Thoughts on this and what outcomes come from this?

No nasty comments or digs please. Im just asking for genuine advice and opinions.

Are you really going to live your life based on what other people might think instead of making yourself happy? If you feel like that then just don’t tell anyone, no one needs to know. Seriously, you’re an adult, so what you like.

Yes he is single. I wouldn't even entertain it if I even had a feeling he wasn't. It's just not me.

‘Drama free fun’ sounds simultaneously like an advert and a warning.

You know him, though, I don’t. If you go for it, make sure he wears a condom and don’t let him take photos or film you.

Nothing at all to be ashamed of, and nobody needs to know.

I ask because that's a classic patnered person line.

If he is genuinely single and you can do the no expectations thing, have fun and use protection!

He doesn't sound like someone who would treat you in a caring or decent way, so if it's purely just the sex you're looking for, go for it.

Be prepared to potentially get hurt by him though, and for him to say you knew what you signed up for at the start.

youonlyliveonce99 · Today 00:01

HeddaGarbled · Yesterday 23:53
he said see what happens, meet up, have a laugh and if the sexual part happens it happens
You know that’s bollocks, right?
What do you mean?
I know what he means by it to be fair.

It’s a line. If “the sexual part” doesn’t “happen” fairly promptly, there won’t be a lot of laughing, or not with you anyway.

Absolutely go for it. I’m 50 and decided that I was going to be a bit more adventurous a couple of years ago.

I met up with a guy I’d known via FB for 5 years, so I knew a fair bit about him (and vice Versa) before we met in person. Had one ‘date’ which ended with a lovely kiss, and then the next one was at his house.

From there it was a very detached FWB scenario. Neither of us were interested in a relationship as such, he travelled a lot and I was just out of a LTR so it was an ideal way to have some no strings sex whenever we were both free. He was a lovely guy and very respectful, sex was great but not mind blowing so I didn't get attached (with current DP I feel a real connection, it’s not just a physical act, so I did get attached to him quite quickly!)

FWB fizzled out when I started seeing my current DP although I got messages for around a year asking if I was single yet! He's said he’ll still be there if things go wrong, which is nice to know but really I think the ship has sailed. It was just what I needed at the time though.

It's how I'm spending my 50s so far.

Regular STI checks etc, then go for it. I guess if you are the type who always gets emotionally involved, then maybe not, but otherwise stay safe, have fun.

Give it a try and if you sense something is off than don't meet him again.

Have fun!!!

I'd assume he's got a few other women he messages for a "bit of fun", so long as you're ok with that then it's not a problem. Have a great time.

It's fine. I personally don't like no-strings sex with people I already know in some form, I prefer(red) complete strangers. But I wouldn't judge, what is there to judge?

I'd be put off by him saying "drama free".

That phrase is a red flag to me. 🚩

I think that's preparing the ground for treating you disrespectfully but making you feel like you can't say shit about it for fear of being told you're causing 'drama'.

I think, sure, go ahead have no-strings fun with someone, but not this guy.

I agree with the 'drama free' being a red flag. It usually means 'im going to act like a total cunt and when you don't tolerate it I'll accuse you of being dramatic'.

Also another for ons as opposed to ongoing things. You can go to a hotel so it doesn't have to be an issue regarding the kids. Tbh it makes more sense because an ongoing fuck buddy, you might get lax with regarding who stays where.

Much better to just take an occasional hottie to a hotel, bang his brains out and never see him again.

Of course it's a risk. Everything is for us.
But its a bloody nightmare trying to find a decent fwb. They never actually want what you want. There's always some agenda.