Betrayal

[Birthdaycake369]

Has anyone been through the death of a husband and then found out they were unfaithful for years? I’ve recently found this out after months of grieving and it feels like my world has imploded and that everything we had was a lie. I had no clue and it feels like I was married to a stranger. I honestly don’t know what to do

I haven’t but you might want to check out the site surviving infidelity. There might be people on there who are in the same boat as you and can understand how you’re feeling. I’m so sorry this has happened to you.

I haven't but my God I feel for you, hoping you find the support you need.

I'm sorry this has happened to you OP. I lost my DH this summer and can't even imagine how I'd feel if I found out he'd hid something like this. How did you find out? Was the woman someone you knew? Sending you a virtual hug x

Not gong into specifics as it could be outing but a friend found out at her father’s funeral when his long term OW and adult kids turned up.

😱😲😨😳

Not personally but a friend found out that her father had a long term affair/OW on his death. It appears her mum may well have known for a long time.

I know in the case of my friend, she has just chosen to ignore that information. In the case of her mother, I think she has chosen to do the same and to focus on the good things over a long marriage.

I am sorry you are going through this.

@TipsyJoker thank you, where do I find that site please? @2Old2Tango i was going through his messages on his phone to try and reduce storage on the family plan and there are messages going back to late 2021 arranging to meet escorts in hotels or their homes when I thought he was at work

It must be very hard for you.
I have heard of this happening on other forums
I have been on. Given the amount of cheating threads we see nothing surprises me 🥺

@Birthdaycake369 ..
Here on mumsnet, under talk topics, then body & soul, and bereavement is the first sub topic... I am so sorry this has happened to you ❤

www.survivinginfidelity.com

@TipsyJoker thank you I will have a look at that

So sorry you have had to go through this. On Chumplady.com there is a whole community to support you too, with special posts and other survivors of precisely this experience of discovery after your partner's death. I wish you good advice and support whether there or elsewhere :)

@Pinkylilac thank you I am currently looking on this site

Just popping on to say how utterly sorry I am. I can only imagine how much pain you are in right now.

Seconding Surviving Infidelity and Chump Lady.

Huge unmumsnetty hug!