Should I leave?

[Gm26]

I’ve been with my partner just over 3 years, and we have a 1 year old together. In June I found out he has a gambling addiction, and had also been messaging two other women. He hasn’t met with either of them, but still this to me is cheating. I’ve stuck by him and we’ve been trying to work through it, we’ve been in counselling separately and we’ve also been doing couples counselling.
2 days ago I found emails on his work computer to a female recruiter, that to me felt over friendly. There was nothing technically inappropriate in them, but to me they were more chatty than they needed to be. There was also an email at 1.15 in the morning when he was out asking if she was out? This one I do think was inappropriate, why would he possibly be asking that at that time? I’ve confronted him and he says the messages aren’t cheating, so he doesn’t see the problem.

however the problem for me is it’s so fresh since June, why did he need to be overly friendly to this woman he doesn’t even really know.
I’ve been struggling with depression and the way he handles these situations makes me feel so much worse, I never get the comfort or reassurance I need from him.
However the problem is I do love him, and when things are good they are really good, but I’m not sure how much more I can take of how he treats me when I’m struggling with something he’s done.

this feels like a head vs heart situation, my heart wants to be with him, but my head is saying leave now, if things haven’t changed by now they never will.

i think I just want to know if anyone else has been in a situation like this? Feeling so hopeless in your relationship but then things have got better? Or is it likely too late to fix it now?

He is an addict and always will be.
He is having, at the very least, emotional affairs and doesn’t see anything wrong in it. So he will continue.
You love him because you need him. If you step back and look at your relationship you’ll see that it will never change, as he’s happy as he is, and he’s in control.

Walk away now before you could potentially end up losing everything. Think with your head rather than your heart. If you at all think you can fix this you are very much mistaken.

And do not stay with a cheat for the supposed sake of your child. If the shoe was on the other foot he would not be as forgiving would he?.

I would read about codependent relationships and see how much this relates to your own behaviour.

He’s a gambling addict. Taking money away from you and your child.

He was inappropriately messaging other women in June, which you told him you found unacceptable.

He’s now inappropriately messaged a female again 4 months later, despite knowing that it is a boundary you are not happy for him to cross.

He is also making excuses and not apologetic for his behaviour.

There is absolutely no hope of a future within a relationship if the person is not remorseful for their bad behaviour, asking for forgiveness, promising to not repeat the behaviour. He is clearly telling you that he doesn’t regret his bad behaviour and that he will do it again in the future.

Do your baby a favour and get out of this relationship before it escalates and they are old enough to be affected by it.