My baby is due 9 days after a wedding that I am a bridesmaid at. I want to offer to stand down, but how do I approach the conversation?

[AmberPoet]

I am due to give birth in 6 months, and my friend's wedding is due in 6 months, which I am supposed to be a bridesmaid at. The announcement was a bit awkward because I had to tell her the due date and, although she congratulated me, she didn't seem overly pleased.
She said we will try to make the bridesmaid dress work by getting it altered, but I think the whole thing is going to make me anxious, and I may not feel up to the bridesmaid duties involved. I also don't want it to be an extra stress for her.
How can I approach this?

Agree with PP - it’s way too close to your due date. Very few babies come on their actual due date and many come earlier.

You probably won't even manage to attend the wedding never mind by a bridesmaid. You need to step down.

I did this very recently. My due date was the day before the wedding. From the get go I just gave her the option of me stepping down if she wanted me to in case it would cause her any stress (while still making it clear that I wanted to still be bridesmaid, didn't want to give the impression that I was looking for an out). She didn't want me to step down. She was probably a bit more laid back than your friend just from what you've described. But still felt good to have a frank conversation and let her decide. At the end of the day you might be a bit uncomfortable and need lots of breaks to sít down but it's definitely doable once you are having a healthy and straightforward pregnancy. Obviously you're not to know yet how things will be by then but just make sure she knows pregnancy is unpredictable and if any little health issues pop up along the way that would be a deciding factor and our of your control. Not sure if she has any kids herself so she may not fully understand how difficult and unpredictable it all is.

In essence, she needs to be OK with the fact that you may not be there on the day and these things can change very last minute. If you really want to do it, it's doable. If you don't, just be honest. In my case I would've been devastated to miss the wedding and it was just something I felt strongly that I wanted to do. Everyone's situation and relationship is different though and I get that. My bubs arrived 6 days later in the end.

Same happened for me! I was technically due 10 days after the wedding, we sort of announced our dates to each other at the same time. I offered to pay for the maternity version of the bridesmaid dress and I said I'd do as much as I could. In the end, as my pregnancy progressed and I had a couple of complications, we agreed I'd step back from official bridesmaid role but still part of the wedding party/travel with the bride etc.

In the end my waters started to leak at the evening do and baby was born soon after 🫣

I'd say keep communication open and try to be empathic with each other- her wedding and your baby are obviously big deals to both of you and either can make people a little crazy..

Totally up to you and the bride. I was a bridesmaid at 38 weeks pregnant! As soon as I found out I was going to be heavily pregnant I told my best friend, said I would sadly step down from bridesmaid duties. However she was insistent that she still wanted me to do it if I felt ok to do it! We both understood that if I had the baby early then I would pull out at the last minute. I paid for the alterations to the dress, as they were costly and I didn’t want my friend to be out of pocket if I never got to wear it. However baby was late and I had a fabulous day being a bridesmaid!