@Positivexvibes23
Yes, it's an abusive relationship. And yes, you need to get out.
I'm in the US but I 'get' the benefit of an HA house. But is it really worth being emotionally abused to keep it? I wouldn't think so. I'd rather live in a 1 bed flat with my 3 children at market rent than a 5 bed HA house where I'm belittled, controlled and emotionally abused.
Can you speak to the HA to see if there is anything you can do? I don't know if domestic abuse could affect the joint tenancy or what effect a divorce might have on it, if any. I'm sure someone who knows about HA tenancies will be along with advice.
Can you confide in your family and ask for their help in getting out? If he's alienated you from them or them from you please don't hesitate to call them. I can pretty much guarantee that they've been praying for that call. You may have to hear 'We told you so' more than once, but it will be worth it.
You refer to him as 'husband' but it's not uncommon for some posters to use that term for someone they aren't legally married to. If you are legally married, please see a solicitor to find out what divorce might mean to you. It doesn't mean you have to 'do anything' right now, you're just educating yourself.
You deserve a better and happier life. So do your children. They deserve a happy mum.