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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Ex Dh wants me to transfer the debt

29 replies

Doubtfuldaphne · 15/10/2024 19:37

I’ve posted quite a bit recently, the latest problem I have (amongst many) is that all the bills plus rent are going to have to be paid by me now he’s leaving. The gas and electric is in his name for our address but obviously we’ve both been using it. I was sending him money every month to pay it but it turns out the account is nearly £3200 in arrears! The amount I was sending wasn’t covering it and this debt goes back years.
He wants me to put all the bills in my name as he’s leaving
What do I say? I can’t add more debt to my name but at the same time I have contributed to this building up. We can’t go halves to pay it off as all our money is going on housing and I’m now having to claim universal credit as my wage is low. I only earn just under £2k a month.

OP posts:
LeoLibra18 · 16/10/2024 12:06

Like others have said, either go with a new supplier and then the utility company will go after him to recover debts. OR ring up the current provider, explain the situation and say you want to stay with them as a current provider. Tell them that such a person moved out and now you are paying the bills but make it clear to them that the debts are not yours to handle they are his. If this goes to court you can clearly evidence that you have been contributing but he has not paid. But because you are not on the accounts you won't be liable and you won't have to go to court. This is his mess to deal with not yours. Just stick firm with your decision, he will threaten you with police or court action but there's literally nothing he can do.

HowYouSpellingThat10 · 16/10/2024 12:20

Is the bill based on proper readings or has he been neglecting to do them?

This still isn't your responsibility but photograph the meters today and screenshot what the bill says.

Just in case it's not really in debt to this extend and he tries to add it to any later divorce proceedings. Always better to have the evidence even if not needed and you should have a proper record for your own account.

HowYouSpellingThat10 · 16/10/2024 12:22

If you aren't currently with Octopus and want to switch to them, get a recommendation code from a friend or family member and you both get £50 credit (or someone here will give you one, I can 😊)

MauveOrPossiblyTaupe · 16/10/2024 14:05

RB68 · 16/10/2024 10:56

If the debt is currently in his name that is positive for you.
Check the account for any payments and whether that is the amount you put in or double that. Write him a response with this information in it, and say you are not willing to take on the account unless it is clear of debt, you have been paying towards the debt and he has added nothing (or whatever) to the account in the last x years. There fore you are unwilling to take on this debt.

Technically you are joint and severally liable for debts when married but he doesn't know that I am betting and so may bow to this pressure - and you have paid your contribution so he rightly should be pressurised.

I would also contact the company involved and make sure they know you do not agree to being on their bill and log that with them incase he sneakily tries to add you as a party to that debt.

I would also check all other bills, bank accounts and joint monied areas as well as pension situation as it may be that he is also hiding money if you have paid him and this bill hasn't been paid at all. This is why monies should be sorted at the time of divorce so a line can be drawn.

The bit about joint and several liability is basically wrong. Joint and several liability only applies in certain specific cases. This is an extract from Citizens Advice:

Debts
Living together and marriage
You are liable for any debts which are in your own name only, but not for any debts which are just in your partner's name.
You may be responsible for the whole of debts in joint names and for other debts for which you have 'joint and several' legal responsibility. For example, in England and Wales, if you owe council tax, you and your partner will both be responsible for the debt, regardless of whether one of you contributes or not.

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/cymraeg/Teulu/living-together-marriage-and-civil-partnership/living-together-and-marriage-legal-differences/#:~:text=see%20Wills.-,Debts,the%20debt%2C%20regardless%20of%20whether%20one%20of%20you%20contributes%20or%20not.,-If%20your%20partner

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