Could do with a hand hold. Partner has just left

[Onionbhajisandwich]

Just that really. He left last night, came back begging forgiveness this morning before work, he’s again decided he “can’t do it” as I have 2 kids with additional needs and he’s gone again. Fuck.

That's great. Your new better life can start now without being on edge all the time. You clearly didn't know your place, hence him coming back and then still, you didn't know your place so he's fucked off again. Don't be worrying it will be hard without him. I suspect you'll manage perfectly fine as he doesn't sound like a decent member of your home who pulled his weight.

Lovely when they let themselves out!

Hope you are feeling ok OP. You will have a rollercoaster of emotions the next few weeks and will have to process the breakup. Go easy on yourself and get as much sleep as you can x

Let him go. The bin just emptied it's self.

If I were you, I would block him on your phone, social media and email. This way he can’t keep coming back and messing up your head. It’s tough. You’ll be sad for a bit. Ultimately though, he’s shown you he’s unreliable and you don’t need a weak man like that. You need a man who shows up for you and your kids. That’s if you even want a man at all. Do you have family and/or friends nearby for support?

Block him and don't further engage OP. Is he the father to your kids?

Is he their Dad OP?

No, he isn’t their dad. I’m worried about where he has gone. He’s not picking up any calls or texts. I know it’s ridiculous but my anxiety is through the roof. I don’t know how I’m going to manage without him 😔

If he doesn't want to be there then you are definitely better off without him. It's ok to have a good cry and be sad. You will be ok, he's just not the right one for you. Just remember that there will be happiness in your future and this shock and sadness will pass. Look after yourself lovely 💐

You already have two children, you don't need a third.

The way he is yoyo-ing makes me wonder if there's another woman. Left to be with one but she told him he couldn't stay, so he came back but now she has reconsidered.

They don't leave if there's no where for them to go. He has somewhere. Believe it.

OP sometimes the trash takes itself out. Onwards and upwards for you!

Stop worrying. He is trying to make you worried. Suicide threats will come soon. Ignore. Ignore. It is good he's not your children's father, you have no need for anymore contact. You're lucky.

You will manage without him because you have to, you're capable and you have no choice. He's given you a great gift. This is not how decent and loving men are.

I assume you managed without him before you met him so you will manage again. You are understandably upset and catastrophising a bit, but you will cope. Allow yourself to be sad but start to plan for the future.

He is a grown man. You do not need to worry about him. That is what he is manipulating you to do. I assume there is something he wants that he isn't getting so that's what the melodrama of leaving and releaving is about? To get you to do it? Maybe to have you as a side piece where he gets no responsibility for the children but still gets to drop in for sex etc? Or he's really decided to leave properly and maturely and not keep you dangling? Either way, same advice, make it a clean break. Don't get drawn into worrying and dragging it out. Start planning for going it alone.

Not your problem where he is and what he is doing. He clearly told you he isn't choosing you back, doesn't want to stick around so that's that. You just concentrate on yourself and your kids. The moment he told you he cannot do it you should have told him to pack his stuff and go and not come back. Never try to convince any man to be with you.

Prioritise you and your kids now. Practicality first. Do they have a relationship with their Dad? Do you have any support? Do you need to look into UC etc?
You can and will do this, OP!

The kids have a good relationship with their dad. I need to sort out claiming UC I guess. I just feel so overwhelmed. I feel completely blindsided - I didn’t see this coming at all 😔

You will manage just fine without him.

Step by step to sort out practical things for you and your babies.

Fgs don't let him back in again.