Texting and Communication

[Lollyp2]

Just checking.
How often does your DH or DW text you or call you when you are away?
I quite often work night shifts where I stay at my place of work.
My DH only messages once a day and never calls at all.
Should I be the one calling?

Another question.
When someone responds with "Do what you want" to a question is that them being considerate or just having a feeling of exhaustion?

My OH will text quite regularly but is slow to reply. He will ring more often than text to be honest.

"Do what you want" seems a bit passive aggressive. What is the context?

If I was away for work, Dh would message if he needed to tell me something. Neither of us would ever call each other. If you are staying at your workplace, I assume you mean in some sort of carer role or similar. Not that you are just on a work trip and having mornings and evenings to yourself. If you are actually working, on the clock, I would think messaging would be minimal, urgent stuff only. Definitely wouldn’t be ringing and having chats unless someone died in the family or something.

I think when you’re married and living together there isn’t really a need to be in constant communication. It’s not like the early days of dating when you may only see each other on the weekend for a night, for example.

And what is the ‘do what you want’ in response to? Is it you asking him if you should text and call him more from work? If so, it sounds like he’s trying to deflect (possibly because it’s quite annoying to have someone texting and calling you when they’re working and you’re busy with other things) but without trying to be direct and say, no please don’t do that. To be honest, it would probably irritate me to even have this sort of conversation, because by the time you get married, you should have ironed this stuff out.

@winz
My DH will text me once a day on the days I am away working.
Unless I ask his plans for the day he will never tell me what he has done or how his day went.
He is an extrovert who will hang out with alot of his friends daily when I am not around or even when I am around.
I am asking because I find it odd that he will send me one text , to hope that my work went well and wish me a good day and that's it until the next day.

@mindutopia As for the "Do what you want" it's something he says to me alot especially when we have made a plan: read "his plan" then I have come back later to suggest something else.
It's a response he tends to give me frequently when I deviate from his plan.
His argument is that it's all said in the best interest which I know is not true.

I fee that naturally if a partner is away for work and has the morning or evening to themselves, it's work checking on them to see how their day went.
Especially if you don't see each other in 3-4 days.
Sometimes I work 3 days away from home and all I get is one message in the morning.