Is it normal to not be interested in sex?

[FTMaz]

Hi
I’m 34 and have a baby who is 8 months old with my partner who I have been with for 5 years. I’ve never been someone who had a massive sex drive but definitely enjoyed sex more than I do now. I love my partner and it’s not that I’m not attracted to him…I just don’t want sex with anyone. It’s easy at the moment to make excuses with a baby and my partner is being very understanding but in the long run it’s obviously not ideal to have a sexless relationship and I know my partner certainly doesn’t want this. Do many other women feel like this? Is it a postpartum thing? Or maybe an age thing?

Thanks

Are you on contraception or breast feeding?

It’s quite common resulting from a variety of physical and/or mental reasons but generally it’s not “normal” no (though plenty of others will be along to tell you otherwise). It’s also not likely a marriage will survive long term without a healthy sexual component. I recommend you see your GP.

With an 8 month old I'm not surprised. How are you sleeping? How are you feeling about your body? How much does your partner do with the baby?

Yeah it's normal for a lot of women to lose interest after having a baby. After all, it would be tough on your body to get pregnant again so soon, so it's probably nature putting the brakes on.

Obviously make the effort to tell your partner you love him and are still attracted, and try to be physically affectionate (hugs and stuff) in the meantime. Keep talking and be honest about how you're feeling and what you both need.

I'd expect it to come back at least a bit in the next few months.

Hi
I’m not on contraception but I am breastfeeding

Sleep is terrible. I feel better about my body now apart from my boobs as I’m breastfeeding so they are huge and not very nice to look at!

partner works full time whereas I don’t so I am definitely the main care giver, I don’t feel resentful for that though and he does help. For example I do the nights and he gets DS at 5:30 when he wakes up and has him until he goes to work at 8 so that I can get some sleep