Keep it in your head

[Maia22]

All of a sudden my husband has started to comment on women on nearly every TV show we watch. Telling me who’s attractive, who he’d sleep with, who he’d think would be dirty in bed. It’s such a shock because he’s never acted like this. I questioned him about it and he said his ‘testosterone has been boosted’ because he goes to the gym all the time, and the powders etc he takes, makes him more horny.

It’s almost made me not want to watch anything with him anymore because of all the comments. I’m constantly thinking ‘who is he going to fancy next’, and will this carry on to people in real life.

I asked him what our daughter would think about his comments and he just said I’m ’pathetic’.

Is this normal?

His behaviour is insensitive and disrespectful. The odd comment along the lines, "she is attractive" every once in a while is not unreasonable if there are grounds for that being appropriate to the conversation you are having. But to discuss how they are sexually is not normal.
Do you have a healthy sex life? Or is he feeling sex starved and this is his crude way of expressing that?

Good Lord! Tell him to lay off the powdered bulls testicles or whatever he’s taking.

I'd offer to contact their agent and see if they'd be interested in him. Doubtful but just being supportive. What a horrible person he is.

Testosterone makes men horny yes, but it doesn't make them nob heads OP. He can be horny without reducing women to objects. As for calling you pathetic, just seems like another example of nob headery to me

We definitely have a healthy sex life, so it’s not like he’s acting this way because he’s ‘sex starved’. But obviously with children it’s not exactly plausible all the time.

Vom. Testosterone can increase sex drive, it doesn't turn one into a cunt. He quite rightly should keep these thoughts to himself. Or, wild idea, enjoy his newfound "energy" with is wife instead of lusting after pixels on a screen.

Maybe you do it too. Start talking about all the men on TV, how hot they are, how well endowed you think they must be, how you'd climb so and so like a tree. Bet he'd just love that.

All of this behaviour is vile - the comments, and then calling you pathetic when you call him out on it.

It would make my desire for any sort of intimacy - physical and emotional - just absolutely plummet if I was in a relationship or marriage with a man who behaved like this.

What do you want to do OP? Do you think you have the bandwith to tolerate this, and if you do, what will the impact be on yourself and your relationship to your husband in the shorter and longer term? 💐

Not "normal".
My boyfriend and I comment, sometimes sarcastically, and if one of us says "wow" to a boy or girl, the other will respond in like. But to comment on whether he'd sleep with someone or on what they'd be like in bed, well ... he wouldn't be sleeping with me again!

The other day I was telling him how 1 of my friends was splitting up with her boyfriend because he didn’t like the lack of sex. I was saying how immature I thought that was.

He said he couldn’t blame him. Then said he can’t be giving her good sex if she didn’t want it with him often / at all.

it’s like he suddenly thinks he’s talking to 1 of the lads when he’s with me now.

I think if it changes to women we know I won’t stand for it anymore. I’m not stupid, I know throughout our relationship he would have found multiple women attractive, but he’s always kept it in his head, like everyone else does.

Think he needs to revisit what stuff he is piling down him and stop and listen to the vileness coming from his mouth. He is behaving like a teenage lad out with his mates.

Its like hes talking to one of the boys.

Referring to your comment, HAS your daughter heard him? I don't know what ages we're talking about here, but I'm 20. If my boyfriend or father started talking like that it would mean a serious discussion.

I'd be very suspicious, personally. It's almost as if he's warning you.

I'd start commenting loudly on all the attractive men on TV. Bore on in detail about who I would sleep with.

The thing is, all these women are like clones. Blonde, Botox, filler, lips done, cheeks, jaw, eyebrows. He calls them Botox Barbies. Very bizarre as he used to say he hated girls that had work done before and it looked ridiculous.

He is the pathetic one. Gross behaviour.

So totally disrespectful to you. And to all women actually.
And if he is now so obsessed with other women and sex what next?
Ii wouldn't be able to stay in a relationship with someone who thought this was an acceptable way to behave.