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Relationships

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Is this morally wrong?

10 replies

Letsformanallegiance · 26/09/2024 14:27

I have a big crush on somebody who I believe to be single. I am single too.

I have my own business in a field aligned to his. We’ve exchanged a few messages around the topic of work.

I’ve asked him to come and deliver a small piece of work for me and he has agreed.

On the surface it all appears very professional but I know my intentions aren’t entirely work-related. 🤭

I feel like I’ve manipulated him into my world under false pretences. That is exactly what I’ve done in fact, because I’m curious and want to get to know him more. I could have asked any number of other persons with the same skillset to do the work, but I choose him because I fancy him.

There isn’t a power imbalance (we are on the same level but different fields) and regardless of what happens, his work will benefit my business and mine his.

Part of me is impressed by my plotting but the other part feels guilty!

Am I acting out of line?

OP posts:
H0TBUZZING · 26/09/2024 14:28

Nice work OP! Exciting!

celerymunch · 26/09/2024 14:28

so you choose him over others to do a small piece of work for you 🤷

He’s a big boy. And a business owner. I am sure he can handle himself op

Circumferences · 26/09/2024 14:29

Omg 😂 do you normally worry so much.
No this is normal. You're not plotting to tie him up or anything I presume?

celerymunch · 26/09/2024 14:29

it could go tits up if he ends up doing a shit job for you!

Seaoftroubles · 26/09/2024 18:42

You've done nothing wrong OP, you are both single so that's fine! You really are overthinking here, just see how it pans out. He might feel the same, he might not but you are certainly not acting out of line. Hope it works out for you!

tarheelbaby · 26/09/2024 18:48

OK. Since you don't work together in the same company, it seems you're in the clear to see him socially too. Just ask him if he'd like to go for a coffee/dog walk/whatever sometime and see what he says.

Whowhstwhenwhyhow · 26/09/2024 18:53

Haha I fancied my neighbours groundsworker and we ended up involved 😅

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 26/09/2024 18:58

I would see this as the equivalent of going into a particular coffee shop to give you an excuse to chat up the barista. Completely harmless. Good luck!

ElleintheWoods · 26/09/2024 21:54

You’re fine, this is the general MO if you fancy someone you have professional ties to 😉

Good way to get to know each other better.

Zanatdy · 26/09/2024 22:11

Ah why not, he didn't have to agree. Enjoy

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