Should you call your children your best friend, is this healthy? Had this discussion with a family member and it didn’t go too well really.

[Caramelshortcake1]

We can absolutely all have our own opinions on this but I’m pretty sure making your children your best friend isn’t healthy. This family member definitely has some kind of people trauma and she always talks about how people are bad. Her two girls she is bringing up to be her best friends. They all do things together. They don’t have any friends outside, they don’t go to groups. They say that when they grow up they will all live together and never leave home. Family is all they need, friends let you down etc etc.

I just find this odd. I mean I love my kids but I have my own friends and I actively encourage them about how important friends are. I invite them over and they go to clubs etc. No way in hell do I want us all living together forever. I want them to go and live a life. But obviously we’ll be here if they need in anyway.

Do you think it’s healthy to live with that belief? Won’t it stop them from loving life and seeking who they are?

My son is now an adult but when he was at school - from 4 to 16 - there was a boy whose mum was like that. He was never allowed to go to parties unless he went too - imagine that when you've got a bunch of 11 year olds and his mum's there making sure he's eaten enough and hasn't had something sweet before savoury. She used to walk with him to school (throughout secondary) and for the last few years he refused to walk with her, so she walked behind him.

He emigrated to New Zealand as soon as he could and hasn't been back since.

Wow. You're not wrong, not at all, but I suspect the mother is never going to listen to you because there's too much in it for her, making her children dependent on her and afraid of the world.

No parties? No friends?

Ye gods the teenage years are going to be hard. If they aren't, it's an even worse sign.

Oh how lovely 😍