Partner makes me angry

[CJW0989]

Long story short my partner makes a person I don’t like. He makes my blood boil, I throw things, cry, shout he makes me want to crash my car at times he makes me want to die.
only him no one else makes me have these feelings.

he comes with a lot of issues and over things a lot, I know the answers I know what I need to do I know my worth.

he makes me sad and angry but at times loved!

when I lose my shit he makes out I’m the abuser and he’s scared of me! Then I’m questioning my whole identity is it me? Is it him? I know it’s him?

what am i doing with my life?

Time to leave him, OP.

The reason why we have a partner is because they make us happy. If yours makes you miserable (and it sounds like he does) then why bother? You'd be so much better off without him. Life is short. Don't waste it on someone who doesn't do what he ought to do.

You sound like you have no control over your emotions. No one can make you feel or do anything you don't want to do so stop making excuses.

You don't sound like you're in the best place to have a relationship so should finish with your boyfriend and get some help.

What is he doing to you to make you have these feelings? Your post isn't terribly clear about why he makes you so angry, and I don't want to make assumptions about your situation, but if a man were screaming, throwing things and saying "you make me want to die" to a woman and then saying she was making him do it with her behaviour he would indeed be called abusive. I would be scared of my husband if he behaved like that.

You need to move on from this relationship. It is not serving you well.

Whoever is at fault, you need to split up.

You do sound like the abusive one in the relationship from this post.

Either way. Leave. For his sake or your sake or both.

From what you've said your behaviour is abusive. What is making you so angry? Regardless of who is abusing who you need to end the relationship. It's a disaster.

It doesn't matter whose fault it is.
It doesn't matter if one, or both, of you are abusive.
It doesn't matter what others think.
It doesn't matter who started it.

What does matter is whether you are better together, or apart. According to you it is the latter, so it is time to leave.

To add more details.

i can’t go to work without him thinking im cheating, i cant go out anywhere with friends or family without constant text!
im on pins if night outs are even mentioned.
he messes with my emotions so up and down one min he is nice the next I’ve done something wrong by taking time to reply or his goes to another place and I’m to blame.

I know my faults and my wrongs.
why is it only him that makes me feel so shit, angry and I doubt myself.

I think you need urgent help.
Take some responsibility for yourself too.

It. Does. Not. Matter.

You are no good together so leave. I'm hoping you have a job and financially secure enough.

Just leave him 🤷🏻‍♀️

How long have you been together.

Do you have any DC together.

If you live together who owns the property.?

Wouldn't your life be so much better without him in it.

This relationship is unhealthy, it won’t improve, time to call it a day

He's abusive and you react with reactive abuse.

It's a dangerous place to be and you should end the relationship. There is no saving it.

Your second post makes the situation sound quite scary. Do you feel safe to leave? What’s the housing situation?