Getting over your true love and losing your future. Our love wasn't enough.

[Lostviking]

How do you do this?!
How do you carry on after your person is gone. When you have shared life with him for so long, every story, every plan, every decision had him in it. There are a million reminders every day, at home, at the supermarket, everywhere.
Worse still you love each other still, it was to codependent and toxic to you both but you both pretend for so long that enough effort would make it work. How could it not with how deep the love is.
You haven't just lost him but your whole future.

How do you heal? Hope?

Counselling saved me

Counseling. It’s trauma bonding and co-dependency. Nothing to do with real love ❤️

Why can't you be together ?

You reframe it.

It's not your one true love, if it has failed.

Your next good love is out there, and your self love will get you there....

Stop making out that everything apart from this is rubbish. You're signing your own death warrant.....

He became disabled in a way that meant he no longer felt he could be a good father and he wasn't willing to be the reason I didn't have a family. We spent years fighting for a diagnosis in the hopes of treatment, I hope he keeps fighting for that.
We also had diffrent attachment styles (+his autism) so there was always some difficulty with meeting both our needs for closeness and space, but this had gotten so much better it wouldn't have ended things.
His condition means he needs to sleep 12+ hours a day and even when awake is exuagsted. He thinks unless this improves he almost certainly will not be able to have a relationship, that means leaving me meant possibly giving up on ever having a partner.
It was a loving thing to do for me, he said he couldn't keep hurting me, it hurts and I wish I could turn back time. life is just shitty and crule at times

thank you, you are right, just hard to feel that right now