New to dating again, think i've found an oddball

[Ampuzzled]

Hello, namechange here as my SIL reads and knows my other name...
I went on a date last weekend, it went really well and I know I shouldn't have, but we went to bed (on the first date, I know, I know). Anyway, I'm thinking I'm glad I did as when we got down to it, he was totally cluless about what to do. I mean, totally clueless. Sorry if this gets a little over graphic... he was really soft all the way through and (sorry about all this), when he got it in (cringe), after 1 second, if that, he was launching into all manner of loud porn type noises, now, I know I'm good, but, by god, I'm not that good. It was like it was his first time. Oh god, I'm so ashamed even writing it all down. I really got the impression it was his first time. He didn't know what to do, and he was overcompensation with his 'oohh baby's' and mega-loud grunts. Poor neighbours.

Anyway, I have said I don't want to see him again as at my age, I want a man, not a boy. Do I sound cruel? I hope not, it just all doesn't add up. I am thinking maybe he is gay? What do you think?
I'm glad it happened in that I'm glad to know he isnt what I want in bed. Should I tell him? How can I tell him?
I'm sorry if this is all too much information for you, but I need to talk about it...

Oh dear, sorry but and poor you!

Erm, I think the virgin thing seems more believeable than gay - but then again maybe he coul just be a shit shag

Just tell him that you had a good time, but don't see it going any further. Might aswell be honest about it. I doubt he'll be too crused after just one date..

Oh no. There are some really useless shags out there.
I'm a reformed character now, but I was a bit promiscuous as a younger lass and was at how crap a couple of guys were.
Put it down to experience and better luck next time!

PMSL and cringing at the same time

You never know, one of my friends is a 29 year old virgin.

Oh god, the shame! He was a very shit shag, made me look back with more fondness on my ex-es as they were all good!
I said to him that I didn't think we were right for each other and he's said how he needs now to go through the grieving process and feel sad at breaking up with me. He was sad at me finishing it - all his phrases and you'd think we'd been going out for more than just one date. I feel a bit stifled by it all I just want to erase all memory of that night from my memory.
No way am I going to see him again, at least it was nice to go out on a date!

oh dear @ grieving after 1 date.

Definately a lucky escape!

Stop laughing you lot! It's not funny!
Thank you for making me laugh at it too, I've been cringing for days. I couldn't febreeze quick enough, not because he smellt, but because I was wishing he'd never been in my house! Bed sheets washed, towels washed, door handles mr sheened and I never do housework.

God it sounds like the crap shag was the least of your worries. Talk about needy!

sorry nothing constructive to add but

YOu don't need to actually tell someone you're binning him for being shit in bed. That's needlessly unkind. I know some people would argue that lousy lays won't improve unless someone tells them they are crap at it, but I do rather think that such people are more likely to improve if they are told about their failings gently by someone who actually wants to continue a relationship with them.

But him saying he 'needs to grieve' after one date suggests that he's a bit odd. He may have social problems or self esteem issues of some kind, but that's up to him to deal with. DOn't give him another thought.

Forgot to say, he's mid-30s! Surely it can't have been his first time?

Is he Ronnie Corbett in 'Sorry'?

Hope he's not too weird as he obviously knows your address....

LMAO!!! Sorry hon I'm just remembering how it used to be in the bad old days.....I had one memorable date with a guy whose name is now 'bad-date-guy', he was soooooo bad it wasn't true. Don't bother seeing him again unless you want a looot of work - plus the grieving thing is weird!!!

Oh god, it's too awful to bear, he does live with his parents, this only came out later on, when I already knew something weird was going on... Oh sweet jesus, he is Ronnie Corbett! Oh god, did I pop his cherry? I hereby swear, I am never going to see him again. You have my word.

Lucky escape. 'Grieving' after one date. Alarm bells are ringing!

No training, no way. It would take him 20 years to catch up!

so sorry but I am pmsl
poor you, poor him, poor neighbours