Been married for 15 years with 2 kids.
On the plus side he wants to spend all his time with me. We are best friends. Always cares for me, encourages me/ suggests things to help me/ asks if I’m ok/ talks to me about things that are troubling me etc. Does little nice things like suggest we go to London to find me a birthday present. Everything is ‘we’ all the time.
on the negative side he’s not very affectionate. I’d like a kiss and a cuddle sometimes but I don’t really get it anymore. He often squeezes my shoulder or ruffles my hair but I miss big cuddles. We have sex and no problems there, I just need more affection than this. He says he’s exhausted and emotionally spent and doesn’t feel very affectionate in general.
we have gone through so much. I disclosed childhood abuse on my side which was incredibly stressful on both of us, and I stopped contact with the abusers in my family which was the right thing to do but left us isolated. One of his parents died and the other one causes him/ us a lot of stress. Parenting is fucking hard, especially when we are both dealing with trauma. One of our kids is bloody hard work and very difficult. We spend every day shattered and mentally drained.
I don’t know what I’m saying really. I just want to be hugged and told that he loves me. That never happens anymore.