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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Why would you lie about this?

2 replies

weirdstoriesdontaddup · 13/09/2024 20:24

A family member has lied about where she is working. We think she’s been let go (understandably may not want to tell us or talk about that) but it’s that she keeps making strange comments about how in her new job she’ll finish at 4 or work from home 3 days a week, which then changes to being in the office everyday (it’s not an traditionally office role) then she’ll say it’s based in this place, then say it’s in another place that’s entirely different. I was there when someone else asked her new hours (I stopped asking personally as I thought it might be stressful for her if she’s looking for work and that’s fuelling the lies) and she told one person very detailed timings, then immediately told another person entirely different detailed timings. When asked if there’s a gap between her old job and this new one, she’ll say she doesnt have a start date or actually she has declined it anyway. Then it’s a very high up role of £50k, but then she’ll say it didn’t pay her enough (she openly says she was on £28k in her old job and they offered her £50k but she just didn’t want it).
It’s all very strange.

Things haven’t added up for ages, and I have stopped asking but she offers this information very openly - and none of it can be true because it’s always contrary information that can easily be shown to be a lie by anyone that knows either the area of work she’s in or the geography or even how handing in your notice works.

I just don’t understand why she is doing this when she could just say nothing at all. She has form for telling lies I should add, and they do increase when stressed which is why I’ve stopped asking - but the stories keep coming! She is a hero in a lot of them so it seems they are being told to bolster herself.

anyone with experience on what to do when she does this? Like I said, ignoring doesn’t work either.

OP posts:
StormingNorman · 13/09/2024 20:29

Some people just let theirs gobs run away with them. You’re doing the right thing by not asking about it anymore. She must be feeling unhappy or insecure to need to lie about it.

weirdstoriesdontaddup · 13/09/2024 20:44

Even if you don’t ask, she’ll still tell you. I try and change the subject but part of me finds it intriguing the lengths she’ll go to when she could just say nothing at all. It doesn’t sound impressive, it sounds fabricated.

OP posts:
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