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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The one that got away?

2 replies

Learning5 · 11/09/2024 10:12

I know it's cliche but has anyone experienced the same thing and wishes that one person would come back into their life?

I met someone at the beginning of the year, a very brief thing, around 2 months. We got on so well and I developed feelings quite quickly. I think he felt the same way (or so he said). He'd been single for a year and was in a 13-14 relationship previously and they had one child together.

When I met him, he told me that his relationship had ended badly but that they were civil and had an arrangement in place for their son. I didn't have any concerns as it seemed like they had both moved on. We were seeing each other every other weekend and sometimes during the week after work.

I'm not sure what happened/if his ex found out about us but she suddenly decided that she wasn't happy with the arrangement and wanted him to see their son more often and have him every weekend instead (I completely understand btw) which obviously he agreed to. We talked about it as we were unsure how it would work between us both working full time and living an hour away from each other.

He told me that he still wanted to see me and would try his best to make things work, but I pulled away and said I needed to think about things as I wasn't sure how a relationship could develop if we couldn't see each other properly. I think this upset him and he then pulled away. I reached out a couple of weeks later and said I wanted to see him again but he told me that he was focusing on his family and didn't have time for a relationship. We never spoke again and I've always regretted pulling away. I know it was my fault as he seemed happy to continue until I said how I felt.

I often think about him and I'm not sure why. It's been months and he's clearly forgotten about me and has no interest. He'd contact me if he did but I just can't seem to get past it. I've thought about reaching out but I can't face the rejection.

OP posts:
tedyoucan · 11/09/2024 10:18

I often think about him and I'm not sure why. It's been months and he's clearly forgotten about me and has no interest. He'd contact me if he did

But you are thinking about him and haven't reached out. You need to just grab the nettle, either it will be fine and he is still single and wants to see you or it won't. I couldn't live with the not knowing. You only get one life, this moment, this second will never come round again. Contact him.

autumn1610 · 11/09/2024 10:46

Reach out and then you knows could both be sat there thinking the same thing. Worst he still feels the same and you can move on. I have it with someone and i hate it but situation isn’t right and we still chat though and say if ever it is right then we will try for now we are mates

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