Did you ever had the feeling you were being cheated on, but it turned out to be all in your head?

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Just that really, awful gut feeling something isn’t right. Interest in me has dropped off a cliff, been together 18 months. We don’t live together, no secrecy with phone use or anything that I’ve noticed but then we aren’t really like that with phones anyway. Saw him out driving somewhere today unexpectedly, he said he was going from his to the supermarket but was an unusual route for him to take. Wondering if it’s in my head. I don’t usually feel this way and haven’t in other relationships, not usually a jealous or paranoid person but something seems off somehow

No, every time I've had that gut feeling it's turned out to be correct. 4 times in fact.

Trust your gut and do some digging, but be prepared to find something

How do I do this digging though??

Been there and got the t-shirt. Awful gut feeling but didn’t think my ex husband would ever cheat so honestly thought I was going crazy. Until I found out. I hope you sort it out whichever way x

It’s horrible not knowing whether to trust a gut feeling, when there is literally no proof, or whether it’s just random anxiety!

If his interest has dropped off a cliff after 18 months, even if you were wrong, it’s still not working.

Unless you are deeply anxious and paranoid by nature it’s not likely you are wrong

Agree with Duchess, at 18 months is it really worth this? He's giving you cause to doubt your own instincts, not Good!

I'm not trying to make you feel bad but do you suffer from any mental health issues? If so it's possible that is causing you to feel this way, i.e., paranoid.
I know someone who was absolutely convinced their partner was cheating on them, but it was literally all in their head, which they could see once they got some help.

Do not dig unless you are prepared to leave because it is a rabbit hole. Once you do it once, you will want to do it every time just to make sure.

However you cannot ignore your gut feeling. IMO I would simply ask how come he took that route. If the answer seems far fetched and unbelievable I would simply start the process of detaching and clearly something is wrong. Especially if you aren’t just a jealous type.

Same... never had an inkling until one day, whilst doing laundry, I had the thought that I suspect he might be cheating. Never had it before. I was correct. Our brains are processing patterns and information that we aren't conscious of. Something has changed in that pattern. Listen to that instinct and explore.

could his interest be dwindling because you have been together 18 months, and thats normally the time when cracks appear in relationships anyway? rather than jump instantly too 'he's cheating' have you had an actualy conversation with him?

rather than all this cloak and dagger stuff, snooping and stalking etc, just ask him?

you don't live together, and you've seen him on a route you would not normally see him on? this is weird.. he's allowed to be where ever he choses.

i would just end it now... you already don't trust him! the relationship is doomed

No, my instinct was correct.

i have a friend who has always worried a lot about her partners cheating, in her case to my knowledge its been unfounded and to do with her insecurities (but clearly I don’t know the facts)

Nope my instinct was correct. Had a feeling for years but had no proof, it was incredibly discreet. Turns out my gut feeling was right, as I suddenly found out one night and it had been going on for years. Thought I was crazy thinking I was being deceived for years with no "reason" to, so I actually felt relieved when I found out. BTW, it's never a good idea to just ask, 99% of men are not going to admit to it, they barely admit to it even with the proof. Go digging yourself and don't let on your suspicions, or everything will be hidden better/ erased.

Always trust your gut. Mine has never been wrong. Even if it isn't cheating, there's a problem otherwise your body wouldn't be telling you there was. When it works, there isn't any of this crap.

My friend had this. Worried herself sick because her long term boyfriend was quiet and acting strange. She confronted him after she was out driving and saw him in an unexpected location. Apparently he was embarrassed to tell her he was having treatments at a hair loss clinic - evidenced and backed up with appointment letters etc.

Unless he's planning something in secret...I had a friend who knew her partner was up to something. She thought he was cheating. He was arranging a surprise Birthday party.

No. But I've never really been with 'player' types. I've been with one bloke that would boast about cheating to try and make me jealous, I just laughed as I knew his 'game' was so pathetic that no right minded woman would ever go there! Yes I know that makes me a bit of a mug. But I was young and silly.
He tried to shag my best mate in front of me and we both thought it was hilarious! So he was a wannabe cheat, lol. Don't worry that was not a serious relationship.🙄

My instincts have always been correct. However I have known women who've suspected everything from the first day and the guys have done nothing at all. I've also known women who can stare a red flag in the face and act like they've not noticed a thing.

I was with a guy for 15 years. Lots of incidences in that time where I had gut feelings, things were off, subtle signs and hints, etc. I was labelled paranoid every time and it nearly broke me. Guy had a break down when I finally left him and thought that admitting all the stuff he’d done over the years might somehow make me see how genuine he was about change, and every incident I was “paranoid” about was a reality. It was hard dealing with that at that stage, but also a kind of relief.

No I’ve never been wrong.
Be prepared for him to tell you convincingly that you are wrong though. Gaslighting is the speciality of the cheater.