I’m seven and a half months pregnant. For the vast majority of the time, DH is outstanding. But every now and then something happens that makes me question myself, him, our reactions our ability to communicate etc.
Last night, talking about reading levels at school for DD. She’s a little behind on the Oxford reading tree thing but really nothing major. When I pointed this out he almost instantly got overly defensive with a curt “I disagree” (because she had a good school report). And started looking up evidence online to prove me wrong. He found something and I questioned it and he told me that “it was here in black and white, why are you telling me what to think?” He was angry and pointing his finger at me. I told him to not do that and walked away, a bit tearful because I was so shocked at how it had played out.
I apologised in the morning, expecting an apology back for the finger pointing but he just said thank you and moved on. Was pretty cold and distant all day. Not like him.
Then this evening (and this is really stupid), we had a disagreement about whether a spider was eating a daddy long legs in our shower, or vice versa. Again, he became irate and told me I was telling him what to think, that it was exactly the same as last night. I called him out and tried to explain that I had a different understanding but he told me that I was wrong and should just listen to what he is saying. I said that I had a different experience of the situation but also, that I really don’t care and just don’t want to argue. Apologised again in the hope we could move on.
Unfortunately, I got upset (tired and 7 months pregnant) and he said I needed to stop pushing him. We’ve gone to bed essentially not talking, he’s being really cold and I’m really upset.
My feeling is that he is being unreasonable but he genuinely and truly believes that the problem lies with me.
Any thoughts? And sorry for banging on so long…