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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I think I need to leave

2 replies

Framer224 · 01/09/2024 11:13

I don’t know where to start. We’re not married. He won’t leave easily. Two kids - preteens. I work full time & rely on him for school drop off. Own the house equally.

I’ll be honest I’ve been here before. Over the past decade his drinking and drug taking as seen me almost leaving so many times.

the past 2 years I seem to have been influenced and started doing it with him. I know it’s awful, I feel terrible and vow no more. And I mean it.

but he’s never going to change. He left Friday night and didn’t come home til Sunday. He’s been drinking and taking drugs since then. He was supposed to go swimming with the kids. We woke up and he sneaked out the house so we had no idea where he was.

he also sneaked out the back door so I had no trace of him leaving on the ring doorbell. I thought he’d hung himself in the garage as there was no explanation in my mind to where he could be without passing the camera.

I begged him to come home all day on Saturday but he didn’t.

i can’t live like this anymore. I feel like my standards have slipped. He’s a bad influence on me and I need away. I’m scared, sad, disappointed.

OP posts:
WorkCleanRepeat · 01/09/2024 11:19

You definitely need to leave. This is a really poor example of a relationship for pre-teens to be witnessing.

Does the school have a breakfast club that you could utilise in the mornings to get to work on time? Or could you explain to your employer that you need to leave your relationship and see if they can support with amending your hours.

Framer224 · 01/09/2024 11:21

Yes I can use the breakfast club I just feel really sad as my daughter really doesn’t want to go. I know in the grand scheme of things it’ll work out. It’s just these little things that make me question myself. Also not sure where I go until he buys me out the house/ I find somewhere. I worry we would need to live together.

OP posts:
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