Dating Agencies, anyone used one?

[NellyTheCake]

I've been divorced 10yrs and been using OLD on and off since then. I've had 3 relationships which didn't last for various reasons.

I think I've tried all the apps over the years. Tinder and Bumble seem to work best for me.

But since I've tipped into the over 55 category (I'm 56), I'm finding it impossible to meet any decent men.
Can't hold a conversation, sex pests, want a woman to entertain them, etc etc.

So I thought I'd look at dating agencies. But I've no idea how much they cost, if the men will be any better, if I'm expected to travel miles away.
I've found one that has good reviews for it's singles events but no reviews for it's matchmaking.

Anyone got any experiences, good or bad?
Thanks

Be very careful
i be been on my own for 5 years, respectable 62 year old man, but I live in west Cornwall, tried every app, website and tried introduction agencies and matchmakers, spent over £10,000
the only dates I ve had have been from tinder, no agency has given me 1 date
im not sure if I can name names, but if you google, you find about 10 agencies all at the same address in Alcester
they all promise the world, but deliver nothing, to a lot of them an introduction is sending you a profile of someone that when you read it you have nothing in common with
if you live in a city , you might have a chance, but be warned most charge from about £3000 upwards

Thanks for that info.
You have confirmed what I expected. I've asked one to send me some information and I might look at their singles events.

I just wondered if I had become too cynical about the whole thing. I guess not

I had a relative who tried 'Drawing down the moon' which she referred to as 'Parting with the cash'. Certainly no results from it.

Singles events might be good but matchmaking usually rubbish.

Yes, its how I met my husband.

I didn’t pay, I was approached by a friend who worked for them, employees are allowed to refer two people they know for free if they wish. I know my husband paid £5,000. The only we used only consider a meet a success if they are still together a year later (87%), I think the 5+ year rate of those 87% was about 83%.

Lots have two tiers, one is a bit like celebs go dating, the undateables etc, but a lot will also have singles events you can go to. I don’t know about others, but the one we used everyone had their identity checked, DBS carried out, Clares law etc, so no one could pretend to be someone else. If they claimed to be a pharmacist say then that was checked, if they claimed to own a house in ex local you have to prove this via the deeds etc.

You need to look at agencies that actually have enough clients in both your age bracket and general area.

Simonjt
Good to hear a success story.
And some more info on how these agencies work.

I have a lot of questions to ask them about success rates, number of clients etc.

I've only found one that's localish to me. But they say they carry out all the relevant checks.

I'm tempted by some of their singles events. They have a kind of slow, speed dating over dinner which looks good. But I need to know I won't be the oldest one there.

I think @NellyTheCake and @4u2nome should go on a bind date! 😁

I’m sure once she sees I’m in cornwall any curiosity will soon vanish

As my thread has been (weirdly) resurrected, I'll update you on my dating agency experience.

I was rejected 😂

I found an agency that covered my area, the reviews were good, esp for the social events. They sent all the info and arranged a phone call to discuss.

I fully expected to be parting with my money and enjoying some nice dates by now.

All was going well on the phone call until the issue of distance came up. My view is that anything much more than an hour is unworkable.

The agency told me about a couple of men they had who they thought would be suitable matches. But they lived 1.5-2hrs away.

I said a round trip of 4hrs for a date was too much. I was told at my age I couldn't afford to be so fussy. And that they would be reluctant to take me on as a client.

Tbf they were polite and professional. And if finding a partner was my top priority in life then I'm sure they would help me find that person.

But I've realised it's a 'nice to have' rather than an essential in my life.

If anyone wants a dating agency around the south east/east, then I would recommend trying them. But only if you're prepared to travel.

At least your purse is still intact

Nowhere in my post did I say they were a "rip off agency"
Or that the men were mediocre or old.

I'm sorry you've had bad experiences but there's no need to project these onto mine.

As I said, I would've probably signed with them because their reviews were good and they have a high success rate.
The conversation I had was polite & honest.
It's my choice not to travel too far.

Fair enough. However I think they were rude to you with what they said, rather than polite as you maintain.
It reinforces the mantra that women in their 50s should just accept what they can get, and be happy about it.

@Autumnblackberries
I agree with what you're saying that it's ok to be fussy
And, yes, there does seem to be an expectation that women in their 50s should just accept what they get.

In the context of the chat with the agency, it was a light hearted chat and that was a throwaway comment.
I did pick her up on it & she did back track.

I wasn't offended by it because of the whole conversation. I felt she listened to me & understood the issues.
Difficult to convey this on an anonymous forum.

In a way, I'm glad she said it because it made me realise that I don't want to be in a relationship just for the sake of it.
I'm happy on my own.