Most of the threads in relationships seem to be women questioning if they are to blame for the unreasonable and often downright horrifying actions of their partners.
For once and for all -no.
You do not cause a man to behave as he does.
People are responsible for their own behaviour, with the exception being people who are seriously mentally ill. But most of these men are not ill, they are just entitled, toxic scumbags.
So please feel free to use this thread to tell others the crappy things your partner does that are not your fault.
Treat this as a no self blame zone and have at it.
I'll start it off, though I don't currently have a partner, thankfully. So I'll talk about some of the things my ex did, which a few members of my own family had the gall to blame me for.
-Lied at a pathological level. Lied both to me and about me.
-Emotional abuse; gaslighting, DARVO, stonewalling, the silent treatment, false accusations, verbal cruelty, neglect, disrespect and the list goes on.
-Cheated with a disgusting pig of a married woman for over five years until he was caught. He even went on a date with her and she brought her 14 year old daughter with them. 🤮 They fucked in the bed she shared with her husband. Utterly depraved.
-A drunk. Binge alcoholic.
-Lazy AF around the house. I even had to cut the damn lawn. He would say he was going to do chores and just not do them.
-Broken promises. All the time.
-Sex pest. Objectifying, horrible in bed, porn addict with performance issues as a result.
-Refusal to communicate. Secretive. Would not talk about our relationship or about feelings.
This is a partial list for the sake of brevity. He wasn't always like this, but got worse over time. I think it was due to porn use and hanging out with disgusting men for many years.
Not. My. Fault.
Who's next?