Distraught child, dad (ex) has left for months again

[Glowpink]

Feeling broken. DS7 has just cried himself to sleep over his dad leaving again for months.

Ex left our family after an affair two years ago and works abroad a lot. He only spends a couple of months a year in the uk but every time he returns and leaves again I have an absolutely devastated child. The worst part is Ex lies to our son repeatedly he is working when he constantly disappears on holiday for weeks at a time with his girlfriend. It is time he could be spending with his child. It makes me so sad and angry for DS.

I am at a loss as there is nothing I can do. I can’t force a man to be around when he doesn’t want to be. Or does but only when it suits him to. There are no consistent arrangements. Ds is just clinging on to random dates his dad plans to show up again.

What you possibly can do is use the effect ex's behavior is having on your child's emotional health to try to get sole custody. It would be a long, involved, expensive process and you would need a child psychologist to verify it, so perhaps that is not possible.
Your son would be better without his so-called father in his life at all. At least there would not be this rollercoaster of emotions. The man is an absolute prick.

There is nothing you can do unfortunately. Just let DS know it's his dads choice but there's absolutely nothing wrong with DS. I would filter his requests to see your son too, so as not to get his hopes up if his Dad doesn't show. What a waste of space his 'father' is 😡

Your poor son, its awful for him. I have no useful advice im afraid but im bumping this for you x

Thank you. Poor son is still really sad.