New relationship

[KK005]

I've been dating my current partner for a couple months.

We live about 50 miles apart so getting to spend time together can be challenging.
Due to various commitments (work/kids) we struggle to spend time together. We do video chat almost daily plus message and call when we can. Have talked about everything and anything and have grown really close.

So far we manage 1 date per week.

I really like him and can see the relationship growing and he agrees. We've connected on a level that scares me. My big worry is will it always be this way? How can we navigate it so that we can spend more time together?

I'm child free but he has kids (full time dad) How soon is too soon to meet them? I understand they have to come first (I respect that) but there are times we could be together if I had met the kids.

Am I always going to feel this way? Should I just give up on this relationship? Will things improve when I've met the kids? I'm happy to travel to him more often etc but I just worry that until the kids are older and can be alone that nothing will change.

Any ideas how I can navigate this? I would hope if things don't work romantically that we can at least stay friends.

I think you need to ask yourself what you need.

This situation would be fine if you're very much a 'I need my own space and I'm not looking for anything too full on' or a friends with benefits thing.

But it sounds like as things are you might be setting yourself up for heartache. It sounds a bit intense. And intense is rarely good, at least when longterm. Let alone when it comes with them being not in the best place to meet regularly.
And having lots of other commitments.

Generally the advice given is to wait 6 months before meeting kids. But be sure to visit his home as soon as possible. Otherwise for all you know, he could still have a wife. You say he is a full time dad? Why? Do some digging there online, don't just take his word on it. You need to know he is single.

Sorry but I would walk at this point. Step parenting is hard AF and with the distance and the fact that he’s full time it will be very difficult to make time for you in a meaningful way. I’m sure he’s lovely but there’s plenty of other men out there. I’m not sure what “connecting on a level that scares me” looks like in practice but it sounds a bit like love
bombing. Next thing you know he’ll have you moving in and playing mummy.

Without going into too much detail mum is def out the picture. Both snooping online and having since visited his place.

I'm happy to continue this for now, will see where it goes.

I don't want a FWB situation, just wondered what the norm was about meeting the kids. As I have none of my own and never dated a man with kids. They do know about me as he's mentioned I'm on the phone when with them etc.

Thanks for your input

How old are the children?

I have been seeing someone for the same amount of time, we BOTH have kids at home full time, it would make it a lot easier if they met or we met each others kids but we agree that that is months down the line and we have no thoughts about blending families for the foreseeable. I think 6 months is the minimum but it really depends on how his kids feel.
Once you have met the kids I assume it will change and will be more about them and being around him when he's parenting over date nights and having time to yourselves.
Does he have a good support network? Because that can be hard too.